Cribsheet reader Sabesbabe, pregnant, excited and apprehensive all at the same time, has a question for all of you…

Congratulations to Kay and her family on baby Vivian. I’ve been keeping a blog to update family and friends and most notably, some items that I didn’t want to post in the blog but that I feel/hope that many expectant parents fear is how the little one will affect the rest of your life and more specifically the relationship between the new mom and dad.  

We are due with our first child, a boy, on March 25, 2008. Recently, one of the news stations had a package on the “Seven Year Itch” and noted that problems in relationships were caused by the stress of finances and children, as couples tend to have kids by their 7th year of marriage.  As a new unexpected expecting mother this scares me to my core.

My husband and I have been together for 11 ½  wonderful years, married for 8 ½.  We thought we’d postpone trying to start a family for five years, but that inched up to two years once we were married.  It took us six years to actually conceive, though we had tried several infertility treatments that failed to work.

We gave up on “trying” for a baby about two years ago, and this past July learned that we’re expecting.  Don’t get me started about how “it finally happens when you stop focusing on it…”  When you have a monthly reminder of how you’re not pregnant, it’s hard to ever really forget that you don’t have a child.  Up to that point, we were very happy together (and still are) but had imagined the rest of our life together with just us, the dog and cat and living a pretty leisurely life. 

Now, with the prospect of a child (which we are thrilled about) it scares me that our precious couple-hood will be negatively affected.  Just this past weekend I was discussing date-nights with some of my girlfriends and how they are crucial to keeping a happy marriage.  I feel like our marriage is strong and happy, so these fears are unfounded, right?

Am I the only expectant mother who has these fears?

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 27th, 2007 at 10:53 am and is filed under Main, Solicited Advice. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.