Co-worker, Will, swung by last week to announce that his family too, was growing from one child to two. (Congrats Will!) Our kids will be the same age spread about 2 years apart. So, having gone through this recently he asked me if I had any advice. Well, we’re still in the early months but here are some of my observations and advice so far:

• Take your wife seriously if she thinks “it’s time.” We found what they say to be true - the second does come faster. Kind of like the old jar of pickles metaphor.”Once you get the first one out, the rest come easy.”
• All of a sudden your toddler will seem enormous and capable of more than they really are. I’ve found myself asking Ben to “Be a dear and run to the corner store for some milk, will ya?” To which he stares at me blankly and says. “Choo choo.”
• The new definition of “rock star parking”: Finding a spot next to the cart corral that contains the special long toddler cart at Target. It may take a few extra loops around the parking lot but it can make or break a visit. 
• French Roast
• Divide and conquer. (You take the baby the other parent gets the toddler or vice versa)
• Going out the door just got harder. Plan and pack ahead the night before. And you’ll still probably have to pad your time by half an hour.
• The return of harmless yellow poop.
•  Your already dethroned dog will look at the newest bundle coming through the door and go, “Oh great, now I’ve just moved down one more notch on your love & attention meter.”
• It really hit me that we were a family of four when I looked in the rearview mirror and saw two car seats with two sleeping children.
• Remember how hard you thought things were with one? Now you will look back and think it was a piece of cake.  (But it was all new and scary and foreign and it was hard). 
• Another opportunity to lay on the couch with a sleeping baby on your chest. 
•  Nothing compares to seeing the kids share their first belly laugh together.

When I was in labor we met my friend Sara at the hospital. She was going to take Ben for the night. I hugged him tightly as we transferred the sleeping guy into her car and started to well up. “The next time I’d see him, he won’t be our only child.”  She looked at me knowingly “You’re thinking how can I possibly love another child as much as him? But the heart is very elastic.”

This is true. The heart is indeed stretchier than a full size maternity panel.

Does anyone else have observations or advice to a growing family?

This entry was posted on Friday, April 25th, 2008 at 11:45 am and is filed under Family Life, Parenting, Solicited Advice. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.