I have always dreaded the Wednesday night of  Aquatennial and try to get out of work as early as possible.  You see, that is the night that the clowns congregate in the Star Tribune parking lot before the annual Aquatennial Torchlight Parade. 

They descend upon the main  parking lot around 5:00-5:30 and ride around in their little clown cars. Up and down and up the aisles practicing figure 8’s and circles and beeping their little clown horns. 

A few years ago I almost backed over one as he zipped by.  All I saw in my rearview mirror was the top of his curly red hair and heard the little honk of his little clown horn.

My boss had a frightening moment when she was backing out. All of a sudden (cue Psycho music) a clown appeared in her drivers side window pounding on it saying “Hey -don’t hit my clown car!!!” Horrifying! I would’ve burned rubber outta there.  Screeeeech ….

So if you haven’t already gathered - clowns creep me out. I blame the clown in Poltergeist for scarring me for life, or maybe it was John Wayne Gacy. These days I’m sure images of Heath Ledger’s “Joker” are making an impression on an entirely new generation - creating a whole new batch of coulrophobes . (yes - those with fear of clowns)

I worked late yesterday, walked out to the parking lot and saw a handful of clowns conversing near my car.  I faced my fears, took a deep breath and marched right on over to them for my very own brand of immersion therapy.

You see I never stopped to get to know the clowns. What I found were warm-hearted  people under the makeup.  I started talking to one of the Aqua Jesters clowns with a purple wig and a cool little matching clown car with fins. I had a few questions for her. She was a kindly grandmother and very accomodating with my inquiries.

K: How much does it cost to fill up that little car? Looks pretty fuel-efficient.  

Clown: Oh, not too much - the motor is like a lawnmower motor. I just use the red gas can I have in my garage and fill’r up. It gets me from the Star Tribune through the parade and back to the parking lot. So that’s pretty good.

K: How fast does that baby go?

Clown: 45 mph!

K: Really? Wow. Can you take it out on the road?

Clown: No,  that would be illegal. We don’t have headlights.

K: Oh, like a racecar! (see what I’ve learned from watching too much of the Cars movie and Lightning McQueen - I can now talk intelligently to a clown.) 

Clown: Um, I guess so.

K: Can I ride in it?

Clown: Nope.  You let one person go for a ride, you have to let everyone go for a ride.

K: So is the Aquatennial Torchlight Parade the only event you do?

Clown: Oh, no. We go to the Children’s Hospital every month, local fairs, other parades - etc.

K: Now, are the children scared of you when they see you in the hallway? Cause I know I would’ve been.

Clown: Some are, and we have to respect that fear.  It’s all in the approach and all in the eyes. If they seem scared, we don’t go up to them. If we make eye contact and they see a smile in our eyes, they usually warm up.

Often it’s their parents who force us on them. They’ll pick their child up and shove them towards us. Now that’s what’s scary. Kids need to approach us on their terms. And sometimes they pick up on their parent’s nervousness around clowns, and that’s what makes them scared.

K: Very good points.

We continued a pleasant conversation then I had to be on my way. 

And so, after checking for clowns in the rearview mirror I drove off confident that I have overcome my fear. Clowns - they’re just funny people. They look and act differently than most of us, but when you take the time to get to know them - we’re not all that different. 

Now mimes on the other hand….

So are your kids (or you) afraid of clowns or costumed characters? It’s summertime and they’re more prevelant than usual -how do you deal with their fear?

This entry was posted on Thursday, July 24th, 2008 at 1:38 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.