Today we have a  note from Nancy who is dealing with a situation we recently went through - transitioning a toddler from one daycare to another.

Hello!

Thanks for all your hard work on the blog.  It is the only blog I read, and I love it!

Kay- I have a 5 month old and a 2 1/2 year old.  We are switching daycares at the end of August.  We *love* our current daycare, but she is not doing daycare starting in September.  We have found a new daycare, and we feel very good about our new daycare provider.  I know you went going through this same situation.  My question is, how did you prepare your toddler for the transition?  Did you do anything that helped to prepare him?  Any advice as we make this change?  We talk about it, but I am not sure how much he understands.  Overall, I think it will be harder on me than our son…

If you are at all comfortable with blogging on the topic of preparing a toddler for the daycare transition, I would love to hear about it. 

Thanks!

Nancy

Hi Nancy -  Thanks for your nice note! My sympathies, it is so hard to leave a daycare provider you really trust and love. But sounds like you were fortunate to find another one so quickly. 

The transition for us actually went pretty well. We did talk about it quite a bit with Ben - as you said, I don’t know how much he comprehended but I think he caught on. We were very lucky on a few points. One of the other parent’s from our previous daycare found our new provider who happened to have more openings.  So Ben automatically had one of his good buddies there.  I think it helped him to have a familiar face.

Plus our new provider was very into the transition because it’s not only a big change for our child but also for the children she’s already taking care of. Sometimes it’s not easy to add new personalities (or two) into the mix. She recommended that we send Ben and Vivian to her three weeks ahead of time for 1/2 days and eventually full days a few days a week prior to starting with her. (super bonus - she did this free of charge!) Sure, there were a few leg-clinging mornings, it’s hard to get used to new faces. But now, as he’s made new friends he can’t wait to go play cars and go to the park with everyone. So if your new provider will let you start doing some “trial runs” I think that is a great way to ease into the new environment, and a win-win for everyone.  Good luck!

- K

Do any of you have some additional tips or words of advice for Nancy?

It’s time to  follow-up on my “Where Art Thou Mrs. Doubtfire?” searching for new day care trials and tribulations. 

Our current day care provider has taken a new job and closing up shop. We have been searching and searching for a new place that we felt comfortable sending our kids to part time.

I’m happy to report back with success! After many inquiries, phone calls, reference checks,  and face-to-face interviews we have found our new provider. (Thanks in part to the parents of Ben’s best 2 year old gal pal who also attends his current day care).

They found her first and she just happened to have PT openings for a baby and a 2 year old. Hallelujah! Plus she was a matter of blocks away from our current provider. Of course, we didn’t want to do this hastily. But we also know that transitioning his environment is hard for a little guy and thought it would ease the change if he had a familiar friend there too.

Our potential provider had us over to observe her day care over two visits. We were impressed with her play-based learning, her nurturing  manner and emphasis on a safe and loving environment. The  children attending seemed to be thriving and enjoying themselves. They even sang a song while they cleaned up their toy area.  I called and interviewed several other parents who have been going to her for years. They raved about her and talked on and on about how great she was.

She didn’t want to jump the gun either. We had to pass her standards as parents too. If we hadn’t asked her a lot of questions and asked for and called references she may have turned us down. She is very big on the parents being involved, concerned and communicative. 

We also enjoy the fact that she wants our kids to become comfortable in her house with the other kids. So in the weeks leading up to their first official day we’re dropping them off for half and full day “trial runs”.  So far so good. (And dad gets time to do some projects at home) .

 We’re feeling confident that we found a great fit!

(And I’m not talking about any random Robin Williams  sightings while he’s in town.)  

Sadness. Our home day care provider of 2+ years  is taking a job outside her home. It was a good fit, we had stability and Ben had his buddies he looked forward to seeing each week.

I know I titled this “Mrs. Doubtfire”, but we are actually not looking for a nanny.  We’re just trying to find a good in-home day care and it’s an educational experience.

Our search for a new caregiver is not an easy job.  We  have several factors making our search a challenge. We have 2 kids, only need day care 2 days a week, and we have an infant in the equation.

As I call from provider to provider, I either get laughed at, “Ha! Ha! You’re looking for what!?”, no call back,  or a sincere. “Sorry,  but good luck. ” We’ve found that home providers usually have openings for older kids. Infant spots are in demand and if there is an infant opening, it’s full time only. It’s been a frustrating few weeks.

I’ve looked into the day care centers but I end up being the one laughing (in disbelief) when they matter-of-factly tell me their rates over the phone. Oftentimes more than a mortgage payment and it’s only two. days. a. week. No can do.

I’ve  been using mnchildcare.org as my main resource - it’s very thorough, educational and informative. You can customize your search to your neighborhood and needs. You can also link to a licensing look-up that lets you know if your potential provider has had a negative licensing action against them. Honestly, not a bad idea to do with your current provider from time to time.

(more…)

Today we have the ”work or stay at home?” query from ” L. in Woodbury” - she’d love your 2 cents!

I need some help!  My weekend job is in jeopardy. I’ve got to decide if I’m going back to work or if I should continue to stay at home with my toddler.  I enjoy being a stay at home mom–and until recently, I had a sweet deal working just weekends. It allowed me to be home full time–but still have two nickels in my pocket. 

Well, they are streamlining at the job and eliminating my part time position.  Now I’ve got to make a choice:  Either work full time and send my toddler to day care–or stop working all together and stay at home without a pay check coming in.  With the rising price of gas, mounting bills and the cost of Pampers, we depend on my check to pitch in on things around the house.  So if I quit, the checks stop rolling in.  But the upside is I get to continue raising my baby the way I want to. 

On the other hand, if I work full time, put him in day care, I’ll continue to get paid. The downside is with the extremely high cost of GOOD day care centers, I’ll probably net about $30 a day.  I have no family in the Twin Cities, my husband and I are transplants, so there is no option to leave my 19 month old with a trusted relative while I work. 

Any advice? Also, suggestions for good day care in east St. Paul or Woodbury?

Today we have Cribsheet reader (and mother-to-be) Jana with an inquiry on childcare costs in the metro area.

… as an expectant mommy I would really like to see what parents in the Twin Cities are spending today on child care- the differences between home day cares, day care centers, church centers, etc….

I sent her a link to this site

- but realize there are many variables. Please feel free to weigh in on weekly/monthly childcare costs and your comparisons between the different options for daycare that she mentions above.