Good neighbors, bad neighbors
Posted on June 20th, 2008 – 10:59 AMBy Jaime Chismar
Robyn’s lucky. Her neighbor sneaks into her yard (with a Bobcat) to remove troublesome boulders. My neighbor sprays herbicides on my raspberry bushes.
Here’s the full story:
For the past three years, my backyard neighbor and I have pretty much ignored each other.
Every now and again, her black lab sneaks into my yard. The owner promptly retrieves her pet but never the mess he left behind. I could handle a misplaced poo if she smiled or said “Hi” when I greeted her, but this neighbor has no interest in me.
Cursing every time she pulls a weed or trims her tress, it’s also obvious that my neighbor has no interest in lawn care or gardening.
This spring, she suddenly started to care about the plants on our property line — rather the dandelions growing under the shrubs and hostas on our property line. If I had seen my neighbor spraying herbicides on these plants, I would have stopped her. All I saw — and smelled — was the aftermath of her chemical warfare.
The dandelions were sure dead. Her hosta and her snow-on-the-mountain were half alive. The leaves on her shrubs were a contorted, sickly yellow-green.
Then I turned a sickly yellow-green. My new raspberry canes, planted a foot away, had just sprouted little buds. I couldn’t tell if they’d been hit, but the dandelions in my yard had seen better days. Her plants are her own business, but my raspberries are MY FOOD.
“What the #$%@#!” Now it was my turn to swear. We Chismars love the f-bomb. Yes, we do.
After I calmed down, I walked over to her house and noticed a new FOR SALE sign in the front yard. I rang the bell, but no one answered the door. A week has past and I haven’t seen her in the yard. I’m totally frustrated.
What would you do? Offer up your mulching skills to help your neighbor kill her weeds without chemicals? Move your berries to another part of the yard? Or be Minnesota nice and wait it out?
21 Responses to "Good neighbors, bad neighbors"
“The owner retrieves her pet but never the mess left behind.”
“What would you do?”
I’d consider returning her pet waste to her.
Should I also set it on fire?
Kidding. I’m not that vengeful, but your comment certainly made me laugh, bsimon!
It sounds like she did it to make it look “nicer” before putting it up for sale. Dandelion season is over, but now new weeds are coming… I’d say if you see her again to say something. It’s very MN passive-agressive to not say anything 
which I’m very guilty of doing myself.
I have a neighbor problem too, although it’s rental property, and I have never seen the landlord. The front flower bed is a 5-ft high weed patch every year, and there have been 2 large toys sitting there for - I am not kidding - 4 years, never used. Every year I call the city to report the problem, and about 2 weeks later the weeds are cut back, and then about a month later I have to do the same thing. The toys never get moved. Last year I moved them myself to back by their garage, only to have them moved BACK UP to sit in the front flowerbed. And not be used. I think my only option at this point is to offer to cut the weeds down, put down plastic, and pay for mulch or rock myself. (I’m not even getting into the stinging nettles on their side of the fence.)
Any suggestions for dealing with poorly maintained lawns/plants on rental property, other than calling the city?
We created a “natural” prairie garden in our back yard last year, which is in stark contrast to our neighbor’s extremely manicured and chemically maintained lawn. They own the properties on both sides of ours (one side is a rental), so when they did their mowing a week or so ago, they also mowed our lawn AND OUR NATURAL PRAIRIE. I confronted them and was handed a paper copy of a city ordinance stating that plants can be no higher than 8″ within the city limits. Does that mean I can’t grow anything? I’ve added calling our city council to my to-do list.
I’d be thrilled she’s moving (hopefully). If not, I think “creative empowerment” might be the answer. I personally would be tempted to sneak into her yard at dusk and “donate” strange lawn art. Flamingos would be a nice start. Then maybe some big plastic swans. They make some super ugly concrete stuff too (also some nice stuff, but that doesn’t apply here). If she asks you about it (which she won’t), plead ignorance. Later on, you can tie a bunch of balloons to her mailbox and let other neighbors ask her what she is celebrating. It could get really fun.
You neighbor mowed your PRAIRIE? Wow! From your story, UpNorth, it’s sounds like they’ve wanted to mow your lawn for a really long time.
I’d totally call your city. Often there are different rules for turf grass and landscaping grasses.
Natural prairies are a huge investment of time and resources. Do you think your plants will make it?
Lawn flamingos are almost as expensive as chickens — $10 a pair!
Cynthia,
I totally admire your courage. I couldn’t move those toys… then again after four years, maybe we all could
We are having neighbor differences as well. Ours come from a difference of philosophy but plays out in the back yard. When both sides are out you can cut the tension with a knife. After the rattan mat, was attached halfway up the fence between our houses to act as a “privacy fence” I have resigned myself to try and remain positive and pray for peace.
Maybe these flamingos would get your message across even better than pink ones, Jaime
Two options:
1. Make friends with new neighbors after she moves out.
2. Install 6′ wooden privacy fencing so she can’t spray over the top of it.
Good luck - not that we don’t have our issues out in the country. I have planted good old fashioned purple lilacs on the east side of the property to screen out our unsightly neighbor with their own version of “lawn ornaments” - i.e. rusty broken down farm equipment scattered near the fence line. It will take a few years, but I am content knowing that eventually their stuff will disappear and my yard will look nicer for it.
There is cheap and short term option if you want to create more of a barrier with a chain link fence. They have something called Fence Weave that you can put in the chain link. The only thing is that it does not stand the test of time and looks bad after 2-3 years. I good short term solution and has that 1970’s retro feel to it.
Long term is to build a fence, or put fruit where weird neighbors will not be tempted to spray them thinking they are weeds.
I owner occupied a four-plex and had a sneaky neighbor dog that left presents in my yard. My complaints to the owner were met with a chuckle and continued visits from man’s best friend. I saved up the gifts from the sneaky dog over a month and put them in a box on his door step. I wrote “return to sender” on the top and I never had another visit.
My solution to bad neighbors (gigantic bonfires w/ (bad, loud) country music in the middle of the night, was to move. Now we happily live out Robin’s way, with the nearest neighbor blocked by woods. I know that’s not the solution for everyone, but it works for me. Yes, we are accused of running away from society, but anyone who’s ever had to live next to a bad neighbor understands and anyone who hasn’t, well, their opinion doesn’t count.
For those who must stay and deal with the bad neighbors, it is true that good (as large as your ordinances allow) fences make good neighbors (or at least tolerable ones). And I would totally be one of those returning the dog poop in as many creative ways as I could think of. At least you get to have some fun in the midst of the turmoil.
Jaime, I don’t know what to suggest for your situation–I would guess this neighbor doesn’t get it and won’t. Unfortunately, that house may not sell for a while. I guess you can keep trying to talk to her if you want–if only once and if for nothing else than to let her know her overspray killed your raspberries. But in the end, I’d say the tallest, least permeable fence you’re allowed to erect. And I like the idea of immediately getting a new neighbor “in your camp”, but if the new neighbor turns out to be a dud too, at least you’ve got that fence…
Until you get the 6′ privacy fence, plant a row of big native daylilys behind the raspberries. They should be able to compete with the berries & pesticide. Plus they’re usually free (I’ll ’sell’ ya some) except for manual labor. Oh and they look purposeful defining/defending the property line and a crazy & painful patch of yummy berries.
Regarless of any reglulation the city needs to deliver a warning and the city cuts it if need be. Your neighbor was tres-passing and i’d add destruction of personal property. I’d REALY pursue this. The nerve. @%&!!@@!!!
Just wanted to pass on a positive note to today’s discussion about neighbors and gardens. My husband and I moved into our neighborhood next to two wonderful people. We live on a corner and our only neighbors love to garden and build with us. This weekend they even helped to build our 6′ cedar fence that blocks out the street traffic. I guess what I’m saying is that we got lucky…apparently very lucky!
On another note living on a corner often lends itself to random garbage donated generously by those driving or walking by our house. I’m thinking of putting a sign in our front yard asking people to stop littering. I know it probably won’t work, but it’s worth a try.
Ah, random leavings on property. We have neighbors across the street who leash their dogs to walk them across the street so they can use our garden as a toilet, and then head back across the street. Standing out in our yard a lot more has just sent them to do so on our neighbors yard, but since they’re the zero-maintenance (including shoveling the sidewalk) types, I don’t feel too bad about that. I am still looking for an attractive sign that says something like “Garden, not toilet” but no such item has emerged.
I think the suggestion about daylilies is a brilliant one. I may now back my raspberry patch with the same, just in case my non-maintenance neighbors get a wild hair to go a-poisoning!
As for dog droppings of the solid kind, I’ve found flingin said offensive objects back into the yard of the owner is very effective. Although I had good luck with yelling “go home” very loudly when my neighbor’s dog used to do the same. This requires a high embarrassment tolerance, which I just happen to have.
I stand corrected. You can personalize a no dog droppings silhouette sign:
http://www.allsignsco.com/nopoop/yowo_sil.html
Hilarious!
Beth…. The visual of you tossing dog poo across the street is fantastic! I admire a gal with a high embarrassment tolerance.
I say you take her a little basket of raspberries and brag about how they’re homegrown and pesticide free. Then mention that you’ve been feeling realllllly strange lately and have lost all feeling on one side of your body, or something like that.
For people who have unwanted pets leaving messes in their yard, those motion sensor water sprayers work on domesticated animals just as well as they do on deer and rabbits.
Greengirls Connie Nelson, Robyn Dochterman and Jaime Chismar are dishin' the dirt from the backyard garden and beyond. Whether you're a greenthumb or greenhorn, they're eager to learn from your misshaps, mistakes -- and most importantly, your sweet successes -- all growing season long.
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