Worried about your college student and credit cards? Not sure how to sit your son or daughter down to explain how the cost of college is affecting the family’s overall financial picture?

Well, you’re certainly not alone, which is why The University of Minnesota Parent Program, University of Minnesota Extension Service (which has lots of good financial resources on its site, btw) and the Department of Family Social Science partnered to create an online seminar for parents about college finance. 

“If parents are well informed, they can help their children make thoughtful and responsible decisions when it comes to managing their finances,” said Jodi Dworkin, associate professor and extension specialist in the department of family social science at the U of M. Dworkin co-authored the seminar with Marjorie Savage, director of the University of Minnesota Parent Program, who wrote the book “You’re On Your Own (But I’m Here If You Need Me) Mentoring Your Child During the College Years.”

It’s definitely worth a look if you’d like to learn more about how to communicate with your child about money, are concerned about whether you’ll be able to identify problem gambling or overspending, or you just want to make you’ve covered your bases when having money talks with Junior.

And if you’re a parent with advice to share, comment below.

Not sure I’m going to get that gift this year– or ever. But a group of Minnesotans is hoping to help. I attended Unity-Unitarian Church in St. Paul’s Black Friday at Church event this morning. Look for a story in the paper tomorrow.

The non-denominational group’s goal “is to launch the Christmas season as a time of spiritual reflection and renewal instead of frantic over-consumption.  This requires fighting back against an out-of-control consumer culture, clearing away the debris that Black Friday represents.”

I’ve long known about my tug-of-war between a simple, non-commercial Christmas and my desire for an over-the-top, gifts piled to the tree Christmas. But this event really made me think.

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I spoke to two personal finance management classes at Forest Lake High School this morning and shared with them this list of what I think are five important money principals to get down before heading out into the real world:

1. Live within your means and find a way to track your finances that enables you to do so for the rest of your life.

2. Get into the habit of saving something, anything. And delay the purchase of something meaningful to you while you save so you can experience how good it feels.

3. Sweat the small stuff. Read the fine print so you can understand the numerous ways financial institutions can nickel and dime you. Keep tabs on fees and interest rates and surcharges. Understand fine print can also reveal jewels that can help you maximize your money.

4. Understand your money personality. Are you a person who can use credit responsibly? Are you better with cash? Are you a natural spender or saver? The sooner you undersrtand yourself, the easier it will be to find ways to optimally operate in the complex financial world in which we live.

5. Get credit. Not just open a credit card and learn how to use it. Get credit as in understand how it works.*

*I was surprised to learn that of the 60 or so students I spoke with zero had a credit card. I found this surprising. I learned to use a credit card when I was a junion in high school. I was an authorized user on my parents’ account, an arrangement that worked well.

Some might applaud the declining use of credit amongst teens. To me, I worry that it delays teaching them the basics until they are on their own, without watchful parents ensuring that they aren’t royally goofing up. What’s your opinion?

And what advice would you share with high school juniors and seniors?

Growing up in a family of seven on welfare, former Vikings All-Pro wide receiver Cris Carter didn’t know much about money as a tyke. “My experience financially was to be frugal because there was never going to be very much.” Today, with kids starting their “adult life so far behind” because of education debt, he said it’s more important than ever to “live within your means.” He has a son who started college this fall.

This is one reason why he said he signed up to promote Visa’s financial education game “Financial Football.” Read all about it in my column from yesterday.

And play the game and share what you think.

As a kid I learned that I should never charge more on my credit card than I could afford to pay off. But I wish I’d been required to make more of a financial contribution to big purchases so I could have learned the meaning of sacrifice, choice, and the value of a dollar. And I still struggle with the desire for instant gratification, since I was fortunate enough to grow up not wanting for anything.

How about you? What did you learn about money at home and what bad habits from home did you carry into adulthood?

Here’s a handy list of age-appropriate money lessons for kids courtesy of Kiplinger Personal Finance editor Janet Bodnar:

Ages 3-5: Big-Picture Years. Keep things simple and don’t expect too much. Encourage kids to put coins in a vending machine or pay the ice-cream man. They can play with fun savings banks, learn the difference between pennies, nickels and dimes, or collect state quarters. The more hands-on the activity, the better.

Ages 6-7: Time to Start an Allowance. How much to give? Start with a basic weekly allowance equal to half the child’s age. Tie the allowance to “financial chores”—spending responsibilities that the kids take over from you. To make the connection between work and pay, give your children the opportunity to earn money by doing extra jobs such as vacuuming or raking leaves.
Ages 8-10: Bank on It. Help your kids open their own savings account. Should you require your kids to save? Not necessarily—but you can have them divvy up their allowance into pots of money for spending, saving, charitable giving, even investing. Have your children save toward a goal, whether it’s a toy or a new baseball glove. And you can always encourage kids to save by matching what they put aside for your very own family 401(k).
Ages 11-13: Parent Power. As you head into the difficult ‘tween years, remember that parents have power. Kids will listen to you if you have a clear message and deliver it consistently. Expand their allowance money to include more discretionary purchases such as video games and movie tickets. Kids shouldn’t hit you up for 20 bucks every time they head to the mall. Having to chip in their own money puts a natural brake on spending. If you’re an investor, introduce them to the stock market with small purchases of stock through sites such as www.ShareBuilder.comwww.MyStockDirect.com.

Ages 14-15: Stick With Cash.Parents should decline prepaid debit cards which banks aim squarely at this age group. Stick with cash. Even at this age, plastic of any kind isn’t as real to kids as money they can see and feel. Expand their allowance to include clothing, concerts and other high-school entertainment. Encourage them to get a job—at least over the summer.
Ages 16-18 and Into College: Hold the Plastic. Teens don’t realize that a credit card is not free money. They need to know that when you use a card, you’re borrowing from the card issuer, which will charge you a high rate of interest. Cash is still king. Help your kids open a checking account (and get a debit card) so they can learn how to balance a checkbook—either by using a check register or online entry—before they head off to college.

Parents, what do you think of this list? Are the age ranges spot on in your opinion? My daughter is approaching 5 and we tried to initiate an allowance, but she routinely gets the $1 and leaves it on the floor or says she doesn’t want it right now. I don’t think money has much meaning to her yet.

What has worked well for me is discussing wants and needs. I wrote a column about how quickly Charlotte picked up that concept for Minnesota Parent.