This could turn into an expensive dollar menu trip
Posted on January 24th, 2007 – 11:56 AMBy Michael Rand
OK, this has relatively nothing to do with sports, and we really hate when people do this, but we just have to share a little story about karma, finances and McNuggets. OK, everyone has heard by now that the six-piece McNuggets are on the dollar menu (for a limited time, those heartless souls). We rarely eat fast food because, well, it’s terrible for the body. But it is delicious, and sometimes we have a hankering for McNuggets. So yesterday we skipped breakfast and hit the drive-thru against our better judgment, to order an undisclosed number of six-piece McNuggets. And ever since then, we’ve been punished.
1. They didn’t put any bbq sauce in the bag. That’s crucial to the nugget enjoyment process. But unlike a 3-0 pitch being called a strike, apparently it’s not automatic. That’s silly.
2. We rolled down the window to make the money-for-McNugget transaction, and now it won’t roll back up. Seriously. These are power windows without power. That’s a problem, and it’s been more than a day now. It’s cold. It might need mechanical attention, which will cost significantly more than a dollar.
3. Said window problem should have resulted in a parking ticket yesterday, when we inadvertently left the car parked at a meter outside the Star Tribune for 4 hours instead of 30 minutes. Somehow, someway, we didn’t get a ticket. Maybe we’ve suffered enough.
4. Let’s tie this all together by saying we believe a higher power was trying to tell us that despite their delicious nature, our guilty pleasure of McNuggets is wrong and we should have trusted our healthier instincts. (One six-piece McNuggets wouldn’t be so bad. But again, we had an undisclosed number of them). In general, when you make a decision against your better judgment, it will always come back to haunt you. There are several Twin Cities sports examples that come to mind. Feel free to compile a list in the comments. (And sorry about the rant. Once every two months. We promise).
18 Responses to "This could turn into an expensive dollar menu trip"
Thanks to you, I am now headed out to MCD’s to get myself multiple undisclosed items from the dollar menu.
Randball, since you have gone this direction, is a Sun Country rant next for you?
The entire dollar menu is great…esp. the double cheeseburger. New fries, with their “healthier” oil, are much worse tasting. Health is overrated.
Personally, I’m waiting for the time (I think about this while working out) when in the future some anatomist will say everyone gets “x” heartbeats in their life, and if someone chooses to use up “x-y” beats working out, they will be healthier when alive but will die younger. Really, they’ll come up with that.
Like that scene in Woody Allen’s Sleeper where he wakes up in the far future to hear that hot fudge sundaes and burgers are now health food. So, what’s up is that health food or fast food claims are just that …claims. As long as someone avoids sedantary activities like golf where you ride in a cart, for chrissakes, people can eat the McNuggets and wash them down with a beer or two.
I am not touching Sun Country. I have enjoyed flying in their crafts on occasion, but that’s all.
Last time I flew Sun Country, I got bumped into first class on my way out of town.
On the way back, I sat next to Capital One Bowl MVP John Stocco.
And there was a hot meal on both flights - though no McNuggets.
My name is Randball…I mean Earl.
Karma, ain’t that a…
Oddly enough, I blogged about the McNuggets the last time they went on the dollar menu. I’m not even a huge fan of McNuggets, but I couldn’t stop thinking about them when they went toa $1. It’s the dang commercials that get me.
You deserved it for wanting BBQ sauce over McD’s hot mustard. Eating nuggies any other way is, frankly, unacceptable.
NUGGIE UP
I don’t care what anyone says about McDees. If I’ve you been outside all day, canoeing, fishing, biking or esp. coming back from camping and you run into a McDonald’s in New Richmond or Hayward or anywhere in the boons, I’ve waited in my car reading the local rag until the breakfast menu was over (Yechhh food like something I would make) and then ……paradise. Ain’t grease sweet !
The best part about $1 nuggies is that everyone else is eating them by the truckload too so your chances of getting hot crunchy ones (as opposed to cold rubbery ones) are much higher than normal. I don’t know about the rest of you here but RandBall, hot mustard is the only way to experience nuggie love.
hot nuggies !! That even sounds nice. Never had one. Now I will
“When you make a decision against your better judgment, it will always come back to haunt you. ”
There’s so many examples… we could create a fourteen-page list of famous last words in the Twin Cities sports scene. A few:
– Ron Gardenhire: “You know, how bad can Tony Batista really be?”
– Dwight Smith: “I bet nobody even goes in that stairwell.”
– Eddie Griffin: “I think I WILL get out of bed this morning.”
– Brad Childress: “They can’t possibly be expecting us to run to the left again.”
– Kevin McHale: “I bet even *I* could coach this team.”
– David Lockwood/Greg Hudson: “I’m just going to stick with the prevent defense for now.”
Jon, very nice work … I’m off to see if “banging the lower panel of the door” will help (dealership’s words, not mine). If not, I’ll have to bring the car in.
Jon–the Eddie Griffin line wins the internet for today. Outstanding.
As for “better judgment,” the best story I can think of has nothing to do with any local sports figures.
My friend Mike was out of ice for his Morgan & Coke at an ungodly hour of the morning. So, he started chiseling frost off the inside wall of his refrigerator’s freezer with a steak knife. Needless to say, the knife gouged a hole in the freezer wall, breaking the refrigerator.
In addition, the venison that was stored in the freezer was placed in a cooler. Fast forward a couple weeks. The new fridge wasn’t purchased yet, and Mike got hungry. He remembered he had venison in the cooler, and fried some of it up. Have I mentioned the cooler wasn’t so much filled with ice? Obviously, the venison had thawed, and then some. Mike soon felt the kind of rumblings that Jeff Daniels experienced in Dumb and Dumber and ended up spending pretty much a full week shuttling between his bed and the bathroom.
Between the cost of the fridge and the unpaid time off from his job, the legend of the “$1500 Morgan & Coke” was born. Pass it along to your kids, won’t you?
Stu, that’s a fantastic story. Jon, you’re climbing the COW ladder. And we will have a new COW policy announcement tomorrow that you kids should like.
Wow Cow Ow …it’s like being elected homeroom monitor. Wow
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