It’s bowl season, which means it must be time for the yearly look at all the swag these amateur footballers get for helping their schools and sponsors earn millions of dollars in a pure as driven snow enterprise. There is a $500 limit on what can be given to each player (up from the old rule of $350), and ESPN breaks it down for us by bowl. The chief items: XBox 360s, LCD TVs, iPod products and, for the very lucky, Nintendo Wiis (not pictured to your right, though some word argue that Michelle’s career arc places her future earning potential under that $500 limit as well). While we have no doubt these types of attention deficit devices are what any 21-year-old would want, we have to wonder if these bowl games might send a better message by giving out gifts that were more closely associated with adulthood, maturity and, well, an education (no offense to all you 30-something Rock Band players in RandBall land). So we put together a little shopping list for bowls next year to consider:

*A first-edition copy of the Kurt Vonnegut book, “Slaughterhouse Five,” priced at $260.

*A 1987 Pontiac Bonneville, priced at $300. It might not have flatscreens or an MP3 player, but it does have four wheels and offers a chance to work on a transmission. Life isn’t always easy, kids.

*The Amazon Kindle, which looks rad, for $399.

*Kaplan’s crash course in taking the LSAT, for all the future lawyers out there, priced at $159.

*A one-year membership to a gourmet cheese of the month club, at $36.95 a month for 12 months, coming in at just a shade under $500.

In short, these young men are, for the most part, about to be come hopefully productive members of society. They don’t need video games and other time-wasting gadgets. They need cultural experiences and gifts designed to guide them into adulthood. Trust us, Chick-fil-A Bowl. We won’t let you down.

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