The Internets: The silky smooth sounds of Mary J. Blige might be performance-enhanced
Posted on January 14th, 2008 – 1:19 PMBy Michael Rand
*Ramon passes along this rather bizarre story about several entertainers, including Mary J. Blige and 50 Cent, are part of a steroid investigation. For the record, we do not expect 50 Cent’s “Just a Lil Bit” defense to be very effective.
*Fasolamatt passes along this story about Brenda Frese (formerly Oldfield, formerly the women’s basketball coach at the U of M before bolting for Maryland). She’s pregnant. With twins. It’s hard to imagine someone more pregnant in this world, unless it’s Dave MN, Jama or P3 pregnant with angst.
Don S. notes that the AVP beach volleyball tour is coming to Target Center on Jan. 24 (where it might outdraw the McLovins) and thus offers this bit from an ESPN interview with Kerri Walsh re: life in a bikini: The potential for a wardrobe malfunction is always in the back of your mind, and it’s never fun to think about. It’s never happened in a game situation for me, yet, but it’s pretty much a scary inevitability. The daily struggle is just dealing with the way it rides. You’re diving for balls. You’re jumping up and down. You’re on the ground. It’s going to go to places where you don’t necessarily want it to go, and you wish it wouldn’t, but you get used to it. It’s a fact of life.
*Swarmswarmswarm would like you to eat some drop bear. Question: What’s the difference between us and swarmswarmswarm. Answer: Only one of us went to a burlesque show on Saturday, and it wasn’t us.
*The Twins’ Winter Caravan starts TODAY, and our pal Kris Atteberry is in our hometown of Grand Forks, among other first stops, with Michael Cuddyer and Mike Redmond. We told him to get the ribs at The Speedway, unless the Twins are footing the bill, at which point he should choose something classier, like Red Lobster.
*And finally, Jim wants you to think about this: How much of the NY Giants’ recent success in the playoffs can be attributed to the lack of Jeremy Shockey on the field and the sideline? All he does is complain. Len Pasquarelli wrote that Eli Manning is much more confident in himself. The only thing that has changed on the team is that they are missing Shockey. I don’t think it’s that crazy. Question: Is Jim crazy?
45 Responses to "The Internets: The silky smooth sounds of Mary J. Blige might be performance-enhanced"
I’m in my third trimester with angst, thankyouverymuch.
The report on entertainers and steroids was debunked when Clay Aitken’s name turned up. Everyone had a good laugh and threw the report in the shredder.
And if Carrot Top isn’t in that report, well, they didn’t look hard enough.
Oh yeah Dave, well I’m in my fourth trimester.
Jama, you win. I suck, you’re awesome.
Mrs Fasolamatt and I found this book on the fourth trimester (child rearing is a form of angst, no) quite enlightening.
Only one of us went to a burlesque show on Saturday, and it wasn’t us.
If I recall correctly, swarm3 resides in Appleton, which means she attended an eastern Wisconsin burlesque show? Good God. Did she leave before or after the amputee strippers wrestled in brown mustard?
Commercial Drop Bear is mass produced on farms similar to American chicken factories.
Sorry, but I don’t eat anything but cage-free drop bear.
Stu: She was in town for the weekend, so it was a local burlesque show. But still.
Did she leave before or after the amputee strippers wrestled in brown mustard?
I’m guessing it would have looked nothing like this…
Did she leave before or after the amputee strippers wrestled in brown mustard?
And P3 doesn’t like and/or think your writing is creative…
Stu
You are on your A game today. Are you sure you didn’t attend that hockey game this weekend? You sure sound like you are still on a bender. It takes a case of Keystone Light to come up with stuff that good.
Keystone Light: Say goodbye to bitter beer face, and hello to lifelong hallucinations.
She was in town for the weekend, so it was a local burlesque show
When I say I’m going to be in Minneapolis on Saturday, these are the kinds of things I need to know about, Michael.
It’s too bad Kerri Walsh doesn’t have the mind of a male aged 13-100, or she’d know never to give an interview that she’d never live down.
Have I missed it, or has the Proprietor completed ignored the TO crying incident? Listening to sports radio, it seems to be the only thing that people are talking about. Well that and the fact that Brady v. Favre looks somewhat likely now.
I just signed back on from doing some writing and after one hour being offline, I just checked what has been posted while I’ve been away. But, before I say anything, let me first say I may have been all wrong from the beginning while writing in and thinking that this was a sports blog. I say that with no sarcasm, but as I read above there are no references to sport in any context but quite a few to showbiz performers and beer. And though I have no time or interest in showbiz I surely don’t mind beer, but wonder what happened to talk of sports ? So, I leave off this post the way I started it and that is in asking the members of this blog and RandB..is this a sports blog or not ?
is this a sports blog or not
Yes.
I missed Jama’s sports comment while I was typing. Sorry. But the truth remains no matter what the subsets involved “Internets etc” precious few postings are sports oriented which makes it tough to know what to write in if it doesn’t concern beer or partying..
Does this whole TO crying thing make him the consummate teammate, as some are suggesting? I mean, does this really make up for all of the Jeff Garcia nonsense and everything else that happened in Philadelphia? He’s not pouting and pointing fingers, which is a nice change, but I think this “change of heart” has more to do with T.O. knowing that Dallas is his last good shot at a title. I don’t think he wants to screw it up by attacking the franchise player.
I’m not sure how he’ll ever shake off that whole “sit-ups in the driveway” thing. That was a career/attitude defining moment for T.O.
Stu, if that’s true how does your post above involve sports…
Stu says:
January 14th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
“Only one of us went to a burlesque show on Saturday, and it wasn’t us.
If I recall correctly, swarm3 resides in Appleton, which means she attended an eastern Wisconsin burlesque show? Good God. Did she leave before or after the amputee strippers wrestled in brown mustard?”
..what sport is involved in any of that ?
Mustard wrestling…duh.
Did anyone else take up Jim’s contention that Shockey’s absence has allowed the Giants/Eli to thrive? I have a hard time believing that. I’ll grant that Shockey’s a carnival ride of stupid, but I don’t know that he’s a locker room cancer, and I do know he was their second-best receiving threat.
I’d like to throw out the challenge that for one week this blog really was a sports blog which should be easy with the playoffs winding down, the Superbowl coming up and hockey in full swing. So, are posts about hooking up for a game really necessary when you have a phone and ‘net, and talk of Clay Aitken, the antithesis of an athlete, is that what you feel make up a “sports’ blog ? I’m just asking since the answer to that question is blurred every day…
Stu - I think the whole No Shockey = Giants Wins is just another case of trying to make an outcome that is probably the result of many things into a simple cause and effect. Which, coincidentally, is the premise of just about every “conversation” ESPN has.
What? Dave MN, are you accusing ESPN of beating inconsequential, spurious and nonsensical topics to death just to fill airtime? I’m shocked.
Shockey is a huge loss, a loss they’ll feel in Green Bay since he was no doubt their toughest receiver and Green bay if it is nasty cold is a very tough to play…
Paul, I think you’re getting a little too bent out of shape about how we get “off topic”. We talk sports, too. But it’s fun (and funny) to talk about things other than sports. Yes, this is a sports blog, but it touches on a lot of other topics while dealing with sports.
I mean, to keep things fresh, you need to infuse/integrate sports with different topics. Sport is not an island.
I guess what I’m saying is that I think that this blog needs to be “heavy” sports talk all the time.
Whoops, misprint…
I don’t think that this blog needs to be “heavy” sports talk all the time.
Giants are riding on a dream. So are the Packers. Difference is Favre vs Eli esp if the temp is single digit. I still believe Manning will fold, since Dallas was way off their A game…
Fasola - Sometimes I’m amazed that ESPN still exists in its many forms. I don’t know how a channel can be so ridiculous in its efforts to beat some topics/stories to death, while burying others with nary a word (Ex: I’m hearing that the book about Reggie Bush has been largely ignored by ESPN and the story was buried on its website).
I’m also confused about how ESPN can still maintain its East Coast bias (I know there are exceptions), even though it’s been a national cable network for years. I mean, it’s honorable not to lose your “roots”, I guess, but wouldn’t you think they’d make more of an effort to be a more national sports network? It’d keep them from having to beat the same four stories to death every day.
I’ll let Rand know if I should ever be so lucky to witness an amputee mustard wrestling burlesque show. Being in A-town, it’s sure to involve some version of a packers negligee and ode to Favre.
I enjoy reading this blog, and the comments, everyday but have never really felt compelled to comment….until today. P3 you represent everything that I expect from a Packer fan. You are self absorbed, you think you know everything, and you you will not go away. If you despise of this blog, and the comments made by readers so much why don’t you start your own blog and go away?
Dave, U R right, but look back on other subsets (don’t know what you call them….the topics earlier in day) and sometimes the posts never touch base/sports at all. Don’t get me wrong. I like girls and beer (in that order or maybe in reverse order) but just on the boxes above alone (sometimes it’s much worse) but from 1:21 for over an hour the raps didn’t touch any sport even curling !. That’s probably (one) of the reasons I write in, to light a fire in here (the other being I like being an as.hole sometimes)….
I’ll let Rand know if I should ever be so lucky to witness an amputee mustard wrestling burlesque show.
My advice is to move to Superior or wait for the next David Lynch movie.
and contrarian, how can there be a “typical” Packer fan ? If some nun in a convent loved Favre and the Packers would she be typical and would you rip her too ? And if it’s true that you never wrote in before, don’t show your a.. as my sports friends say, don’t reveal your own bias, ay
At least Rand doesn’t try to make something out of nothing like LENIII and AV do all the time… I’d much rather be entertained than have a serious discussion about the ramifications of Tony Romo’s trip to Mexico on his readiness for the game on Sunday. (BTW - Payton Manning spent his off-week practicing in Indy - sure helped him win, didn’t it?)
Stu - I’d imagine some of the shadier establishments in Madison cater to that as well.
Are you kidding, P3? If Peyton Manning was practicing, it was to lick the filling out of Oreos…
Nevermind, that wasn’t directed at you, P3. It was for UofM2010
I saw the ad…didn’t do much for sales, I think
Dave, after 6 years in Madison, 4 undergrad, 2 grad, I can show you some places where you need a tetanus shot to get in…
Well, really, are NFL fans really sitting around going, “You know what’d be good with my Miller Lite? An Oreo! Better yet, a Double Stuf Oreo!”?
Dave, after 6 years in Madison, 4 undergrad, 2 grad, I can show you some places where you need a tetanus shot to get in…
Now would I actually need the syringe filled with tetanus vaccine, because, I mean, I can work on getting that figured out.
Oh yeah, and I was probably in one of those places during a freshman year summer road trip.
One is/was called the Kollege Klub (KK)..huge place..tons of fake IDs..the alley reeking of recycled beer…and 18 year old women tasting their freedom for the first time..and 18 year old males hovering like the wolves they would be for 4 years..yeah, studying was pretty hard
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