Last night’s thrilling Wild game — overtime? Who would have thought? — ended at right around midnight according to our calculations. Some of you might have gone to bed or fallen asleep on various couches or chairs. You are in this morning’s Hall of Shame. If you’re going to commit to a late night game, particularly in the playoffs, you have to see it all the way through. That’s just one of the rules of late night sports viewing that we’d like you to carry over to tonight, when Minnesota and Colorado do this all over again at 9 p.m., this time with the Wild ahead 2-1 in the series.

*The same rule that applies to you applies to your children, though they have a little more leeway to nod off. Not a lot more, just a little more. But either put them to bed or let them try to fight it out all the way through. They’re going to learn how to be tired at school sometime. Why not start now?^

*Do not adjust yourself into a more comfortable position as the game wears on. Danger! Danger! Stand up if you have to. Do some jumping jacks. Poke yourself with a fork. Whatever it takes to not fall asleep.

*Don’t overextend yourself emotionally too early. This includes getting into a lather over an early penalty (blaming the refs is so uncouth anyway) or sinking to bottom just because of an early deficit.

*There are various narcotics, available via the Internet or on some street corners, that will help you stay awake. DO NOT TAKE THESE. They are dangerous and beneath you. Nothing stronger than the government-sanctioned caffeine, please.

*If you are watching alone, establish a connection with the outside world, be it on a blog comment board, telephone, text message, whatever. These moments of interaction will keep you alert.

*Swear. A lot. It’s been scientifically proven^^ that a good chain of expletives helps you stay up a full 45 minutes later than keeping words too bottled up. This might seem to contradict the earlier rule about not getting too worked up. It does not.

*Always remember the key percentages: you will be 97 percent happier waking up the next morning after a win as opposed to a loss, but you will be 142 percent less happy if you miss the ending.

What else? Not even the Twins’ bullpen could sully last night if you enjoy playoff hockey. … Full NFL schedule is out later today.

Fasola-link! Catching up with Mudcat Grant.

^Not the preferred method among child development specialists.

^^No.

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