It’s been a while since we checked in on Pat Neshek’s web site, and that’s really a shame. Maybe he fell out of sight, out of mind with a slow start to this season (last night’s seven-pitch inning not included). His recent review of the 2008 Topps Heritage baseball cards was enjoyable, but what really interested us was an April 14 entry about how players approach fan mail. It was a nice realistic window into the minds of Major Leaguers. Here are some of the key takeaways.

Basically when you send out a letter it arrives at the Metrodome and is sorted out by Ryan, one of our clubhouse guys. Each day a big mail pile arrives and has to be sorted.

Clubhouse guy = de facto mailman. Got it.

Some guys do their mail, some don’t and some pay marketing firms to open their mail and throw in a generic letter with a photo. When sending to players one of the biggest things you have to know is if the guy does his mail or not. I mean it’s a waste if you spend a $1 on a couple stamps and lose a baseball card…nobody likes that. So finding out who signs is huge.

This is the nice part about Neshek. He still understands what it’s like to be a dorky fan (and we mean that in a good way).

Okay so you have the address and the guy signs. What else? Well for me my favorite letters are short and to the point. In a perfect world my favorite letter would be “What’s up Pat, I know you are busy, just wanted you to sign this card if you have time!” I think most players would like it this way also. There are many times in the clubhouse when guys are opening their mail and they either get a 2 page letter or something so ridiculous they have to show everyone. To be honest probably only a handful of guys read the longer letters…most guys grab the SASE, sign the card, toss the letters without reading them and put the mail in a pile.

This probably explains why that 492-stanza poem you sent back in the day to Greg Gagne, rhyming glove with love on three separate occasions, didn’t elicit a response but can probably be recited, at least in chunks, by the likes of Scott Leius and Gene Larkin.

Never ever ask another player to get something signed from another player. It happens…every week I get one of these and have to toss it. I guess in Junior High terms it would be like a guy trying to get the hot girl and using her ugly friend to get in with her…it’s just not right.

Junior high? Been to a downtown bar lately, Pat? That practice did not die on the vine at age 14 for many a collared player. But still a fair point. Don’t try to get Joe Mauer’s autograph via Nick Punto. He has every right to strap your card to his chest when he practices diving into first base.

Always include a SASE. What’s a SASE some of the younger people might ask. It’s short for Self Addressed Stamped Envelope…What’s that…it’s a return letter that has a stamp and address already on it so the player can throw the card in quickly. When I do my letters if there is no SASE there will be no response. I’ve collected tons of baseballs, hats, shirts, cards and other things over the past couple years because there was no SASE. I don’t want the stuff but I also do not think I should have to go to the post office, buy an envelope, address it up and pay for the postage.

He certainly has the money, but he makes a fair point. It’s a time issue. A rule is a rule. Without rules, what are we? Well within his rights, we say.

I like to do my mail in the clubhouse once it comes in. Sometimes we are on the road for a long time like right now so it might take 3 weeks to get back from me. Be patient and if you follow the rules above you might have some success. Also the offer still stands … Send me any signed baseball or hockey card no matter how good the player was or is or at what level and I’ll trade you for one of my cards signed!

Even Denny Hocking? Right on! Your thoughts?

This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008 at 1:21 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.