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Friday Night Long Snapper: Part III

Posted on May 23rd, 2008 – 3:00 PM
By Michael Rand

The dramatic (and short) conclusion to Ramon’s homage to Peter King:

FACTOID OF THE WEEK THAT WOULD ONLY INTEREST ME

Bobby Bryant never played at more than 170 pounds.

AGGRAVATING/ENJOYABLE TRAVEL STORY OF THE WEEK

With all the road construction, I’ve found it nearly impossible to get to the Southdale YMCA without traveling side streets. At first I found myself filled with road rage; but after a couple weeks I found some beautiful side streets between South Minneapolis and Southdale. I highly recommend side streets for any of you who need to travel by car in the Twin Cities these next couple years.

15 Responses to "Friday Night Long Snapper: Part III"

jama says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:06 pm

Travel by car? Maybe next time

Stu says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:06 pm

Also of interest: Bobby Bryant had a great mustache. Thick, vibrant and bushy.

Dave MN says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:10 pm

Travel by car?

I prefer to ALMOST CAUSE PARADOX

StraightCashHomey says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:13 pm

I always find myself thrilled while driving side streets in that area because there are plenty of cake-eaters* to run over.

*This joke is more fun when said directly to my Edina friends.

Dave MN says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:20 pm

SCH: That brings to mind a story from a couple years ago. I was driving in the warehouse district, probably headed to Bunkers to see Dr. Mambo’s Combo, when I noticed that the Edina Realty neon sign wasn’t quite right. It read “Edina Rea”

To which I said, “That’s what you get when you eat too much cake.”

StraightCashHomey says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:36 pm

Heh. A common ailness in those parts. I always think it’s funny how Xerxes becomes York in Edina… Like “Xerxes” is too ugly a word for the Edinians to hear.

StraightCashHomey says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:38 pm

(cont’d, got jumpy)… I’m sure it’s because of east-west location, but Xerxes is an actual thoroughfare. Seems to me that it would make more sense to stay Xerxes.

Dave MN says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:44 pm

I would think that they’d keep Xerxes, it sounds kind of pompous. I swear I’ve heard an Edina tennis player yell out “Son of Xerxes!” after making an unforced error.

The Hootie says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:50 pm

There are few things that amuse me as much as hearing my relatives from Boston say “Xerxes.”

StraightCashHomey says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 3:55 pm

Nah, Dave, their parents are more powerful than the gods. TH, how do Bostonians say it?

The Hootie says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 4:03 pm

I don’t know if I can possibly do it justice trying to type it phonetically. Something along the line of “Zeeeeeeurk-zeeese”. (Nope, certianly did NOT do it justice. Best I can do, though.)

Remember the SNL character Jimmy Fallon played where he said “wicked pissa” every 7.2 seconds? Imagine that character saying it.

StraightCashHomey says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 4:08 pm

I have officially added “me practicing a Boston accent in order to accurately say ‘Xerxes’ in a Boston accent” to the moments of my life that I am most happy weren’t televised.

Dave MN says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 4:15 pm

I have officially added “me practicing a Boston accent in order to accurately say ‘Xerxes’ in a Boston accent” to the moments of my life that I am most happy weren’t televised.

I just wonder how many others were doing it. I was trying to figure out what it sounded like even before The Hootie tried to spell it phonetically.

StraightCashHomey says:

May 23rd, 2008 at 4:57 pm

A kid I knew in school was from a suburb of Boston and we’d always make him say, “Let’s go have a beer at the bar.” So that’s where I always start my Boston accent. It just usually doesn’t lead to “Xerxes.”

Shifty McShifterson says:

May 24th, 2008 at 11:39 am

Those side streets were my babies 10 years ago when I used them to beat freeway congestion. I can’t imagine the pain now.

It’s funny and admirable that Edina has held onto the “cake eaters” tag all these years. That’s stamina, I tellzya.

“Eks-”, pause of confusion*, “Zawksess” is what I heard most often.

*That’s my electro death metal band’s album title, don’t you steal it.

Lastly, “Sooo, let’s get’n teh carrr and go ta teh barrr, eh?” was what all my L.A. friends made me say when visiting shortly after Fargo’s release. Of course, having long extinguished the accent, turning it back on was both a blast and sooo worth it to play the ham.