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Worthington, Minn.: Your U.S.A. windsurfing capital

Posted on June 10th, 2008 – 12:51 PM
By Michael Rand

When you think windsurfing, you think of fair-haired, sun-drenched California dudes. Are we right? Huh, maybe it’s just us. But you probably don’t think immediately of, say, Worthington, Minn. But for the second time — starting tomorrow — that fine city will play host to the U.S. Windsurfing National Championships. So, um, we don’t have much more to say about it than that. But yeah, Worthington. Good job. (Thanks to Don S. for passing along the info).

Perhaps we could turn this into somewhat of a mid-day talker since we’ll be out of here for a while: what are the other surprising hidden sports gems found around the great state of Minnesota (or border states, we suppose)? Stu, please keep in mind that cow-tipping is not an official sport.

51 Responses to "Worthington, Minn.: Your U.S.A. windsurfing capital"

Dave MN says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:00 pm

Stu, underage drinking also isn’t a sport

Dave MN says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:02 pm

The reason why I bring that up, is that Rocket told me that Stu is single-handedly responsible for all of the underage drinking in Stearns County.

Stu says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:07 pm

Stu, please keep in mind that cow-tipping is not an official sport.

Only if you’re not doing it right.

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:15 pm

I so desperately want to thread together the whole Stu + cow tipping + Stearns County into a cruel joke about the comely Mrs. Stu. But I won’t because I am a gentleman and because my beef is not with her, it’s with her [redacted]-poor choice of an [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] husband.

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:18 pm

I so desperately want to thread together the whole Stu + cow tipping + Stearns County into a cruel joke about the comely Mrs. Stu…

But I won’t because I am a gentleman and because my beef is not with her, it’s with her [redacted]-poor choice of an [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] husband.

Joker says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:18 pm

Dave

While underage drinking may not be a sport, it does directly contribute to sport [redacted]ing

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:20 pm

I guess that putdown was so great that I had to post it twice. In you face, Stu!

MC Creme Fraiche says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:22 pm

Worthington is also billed as the Turkey Capital of the World. They have a celebration every fall called Turkey Days. I think it’s usually around Labor Day weekend. They have Turkey races. It’s crazy. Also, Jesse James and his gang robbed the bank in Worthington before their downfall in Northfield. These are the things I know, don’t ask me why.

Dave MN says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:26 pm

These are the things I know, don’t ask me why.

And these are the Dave’s I know…

Stu says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:35 pm

Oh, it’s on now, Rocket.

All responses to your vicious personal attacks will be made in the form of haikus featuring the names of old game show hosts:

None of your jabs match
The eloquence and verve of
A young Gene Rayburn.

jama says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:41 pm

Some sad news on the home front.

http://www.startribune.com/sports/preps/19717374.html?location_refer=Homepage

Let’s hope he comes out of surgery ok.

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:42 pm

You want to throw down in haiku, Stu? You just made a very poor choice, my friend…

Cow-tipping is fun
If you are stupid and drunk
Or your name is Stu

Joker says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:51 pm

“Cow-tipping is fun If you are stupid and drunk Or your name is Stu”

Or all 3

Stu says:

June 10th, 2008 at 1:54 pm

Wink Martindale
Would tell you that your broadsides
Are ineffective

fasolamatt says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:02 pm

The Feud’s Richard Dawson
Wants young Dave Em En and Stu
To Kiss And Make Up

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:04 pm

Chuck Woolery would
Beat you and Wink without mercy
In only two and two

fasolamatt says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:04 pm

Oops. That should be
“Feud’s” Richard Dawson.

The high point of my freshman year of college was a late fall Tuesday afternoon Organizational Behavior class lecture, many of us almost asleep, when Louis from Georgia leaned over to Joe and me and said
“Hey Matt, I wrote a Hi-Koo!”

See the M’retta girls
Layin in their Sears Bikinis
On the Georgia Clay

(helps to know that Marietta Georgia = Coon Rapids MN)

Only poetry I’ve ever memorized.

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:08 pm

(fixing the syllables)

Chuck Woolery would
Beat you and Wink without mercy
In just two and two

(syllables fixed)

Stu says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:10 pm

Chuck Woolery would
Beat you and Wink without mercy
In only two and two

The last line of your
haiku has six beats, not five
Rolf Benirschke weeps

jama says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:10 pm

The crowd today is a little to smart for my liking. Go back and drink a 6 pack and then start posting. That way I don’t feel so dum.

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:18 pm

The quintessential
Bob Eubanks says Stu is not
The grammar police

Brandon says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:19 pm

We’re looking down on Wayne’s basement.
Only that’s not Wayne’s basement.
Isn’t that weird?

Rotoblinders says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:44 pm

And I can guarantee there will be NO wind for the regatta, as that has become an annual trend.

Dave MN says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:51 pm

The great Bob Barker
Never missed a putt on air
Not so much for Stu

Stu says:

June 10th, 2008 at 2:58 pm

If Bert Convy could
Read this thread it would be of
Note, since he is dead.

jama says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:01 pm

Is Stu or Stuart
Better? Or is it Stewie?
Really hard to say

Dave MN says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:01 pm

It’s funny, after Rand takes the “haiku” message out of his RandBall description, something like this thread happens.

Take note everyone, Rand doesn’t “welcome our tasteless haikus” anymore

Dave MN says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:03 pm

Muppet, Guy Smiley
Is better than Stu at life
And he’s a puppet

jama says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:14 pm

Pile on Stu today
This should be interesting
Will he still be COW?

Stu says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:16 pm

Pat Sajak says the
Northern Plains Indian Law
Center can eat it

fasolamatt says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:27 pm

I believe that all
the hosts that I have heard of
are named: ‘cept Jim Lange

fasolamatt says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:29 pm

And even now, I sit here, sullen,
because I forgot the late Bill Cullen.

Toonces51 says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:32 pm

Just wanted to let you all know–Joker just called from the golf course (no mention of what kind of beer he was drinking, cheap or otherwise), and asked me to let you all know that he just found out about Cedric Benson being released.

He said he will be on tomorrow to continue mocking Benson and the Bears (not necessarily in that order).

Dave MN says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:32 pm

Peter Tomarken
Read poems about Whammys
While Stu’s in jammies

StraightCashHomey says:

June 10th, 2008 at 3:45 pm

Haikus are awesome.
But some of them don’t make sense.
Yellow bicycle.

RandBall says:

June 10th, 2008 at 5:05 pm

This is what happens
When I leave you kids alone
For secret project

Jon says:

June 10th, 2008 at 5:13 pm

The secret project
Can only give us one thing:
RandBites: On TV!

RandBall says:

June 10th, 2008 at 5:16 pm

you’re either on something or onto something.

Clarence Swamptown says:

June 10th, 2008 at 5:48 pm

Burt Reynolds changes
his name to Turd Furgeson
Says “Suck it Trebek”

Rocket says:

June 10th, 2008 at 6:06 pm

Spinning in his grave
Ray Combs angrily declares
“This feud is over!”

UofM2010 says:

June 10th, 2008 at 6:07 pm

Pat Sajack sayeth
Rocket’s line two of beat down
Still seven syll’bles

Stu says:

June 10th, 2008 at 6:38 pm

This is what happens
When I leave you kids alone
For secret project

My official guess: Page 2.1

Spinning in his grave
Ray Combs angrily declares
“This feud is over!”

That’s just outstanding.

jama says:

June 10th, 2008 at 9:58 pm

“Randball: This t-shirt took 2 years to make.”

And now they are finally done!

super rookie says:

June 10th, 2008 at 11:52 pm

I can’t wait for Randball TV.

I just saw the memo…how exciting!

My guess is that the first show will revolve around Stu and cow-tipping.

fasolamatt says:

June 11th, 2008 at 7:27 am

Here’s the RandBall TV memo.

jama says:

June 11th, 2008 at 7:45 am

Rand with a face destined for the Newspaper, how much time are you going to spend in the make up trailer?

Stu says:

June 11th, 2008 at 8:22 am

Great. Lileks.

Dave MN says:

June 11th, 2008 at 8:32 am

Hey, at least it’s not the Katherine Kersten channel…

I’d imagine it as being like an intolerant, closed-minded Cyndi Brucato. *shudder*

My God, if Brucato isn’t the reason not to switch to HD, I don’t know what is.

Clarence Swamptown says:

June 11th, 2008 at 8:49 am

Mike Adamle hosts
Star Tribune Gladiators
Rand versus Lileks

Joker says:

June 11th, 2008 at 9:06 am

Cedric Benson cut
Jama hides this fact
The Bear’s Adrian Peterson is not the Viking’s Adrian Peterson