Let’s start this post with an apology to the good sir who was bringing us beverages on Saturday during the BI golf classic at Deer Run in Victoria. See, we had to get Local Quipster back to his home because, frankly, missing six hours of potty training weekend was about as much as the LQBH was going to handle. Add to that the fact that the ATM from which we attempted to procure cash on the way to the ATM-less Deer Run was being serviced, to the tune of, “if everything goes well, you can use it in 45 minutes,” (thanks, captain) and add the T-shirt payment made to Kirschtopia (pictured, and founder of said golfing event), and it turned out we had $2 combined between the two of us after the round was over. So the suggestion to even “throw him $5″ was ditched for a different plan: throw our clubs in the car and get the hell out of there. Next year, we’ll make it up to you. We swear. Now, the golf: predictably regrettable. As mentioned, obviously we are not golfers. In a best ball format (or whatever you call it when both players hit and then you both hit again from the site of the best shot, and so on — and really, we’d be find a “worst ball” format to be far more intriguing) we shot an 86. That’s 15 over par, even though we were taking the “best” of the shots. We did finish fairly strong, playing at just 1-over for the final five. We were just getting warmed up. Our main regrets: The holes where both of us hit out of bounds and both of us hit into the water. Those were costly; the fact that the picture of Kirschtopia doesn’t include his unsightly pants, which he bought on eBay. Who buys pants on eBay? Someone suggested that they were stolen from Sam Snead’s grave. Not too far off, wethinks; and, finally, we regret that we aren’t better at golf and had to sully the course with our foul play. That said, it was a beautiful day for a nice ride in the cart. Those playing along with us, the Smoky Matts, fired a 74. They made a lot of putts and tended not to hit it in the water or out of bounds. We’re not sure where they finished in the big picture, or where we finished in the big picture, but if we had to guess we think they might have challenged for the lead while we challenged for the un-lead. That’s just the way it goes.

Question: What is your favorite friend-sponsored sports tournament? Discuss.

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