It’s a baseball season, which means there’s a Manny Ramirez saga going on. (By the way, replace baseball with football and “Manny Ramirez” with “Brett Favre” and that sentence still works. That’s why we love sentences. They’re just interchangeable building blocks. The protein of communication). So this time, Manny is *alleged* to be faking an injury, which combined with less than stellar team chemistry has led him to say, “I’m tired of them. They’re tired of me,” in regards to the Red Sox. This got us thinking, of all things, about how Manny’s act would play in Minnesota — not because it could ever happen, despite the fact that such a bold move like acquiring Manny would likely make the local squad an even bigger playoff contender (again, substitute Favre and it works. You know it does). No, we really just were wondering how “Manny Being Manny” would have been received by fans here — a polarizing, quirky, talented and infuriating player in a market that generally reaches its limit when it comes to putting up with [redacted]. (See: Moss, Randy). Ramirez played eight years with Cleveland and is in his eighth with Boston. Just two teams in 16 years, which suggests that even though his eccentricities are well-known, the worst of his offenses were not serious enough for teams to give up on him. But the perceived lack of hustle — earned in some cases, not earned in others — combined with multiple charges of faking injuries? That would not fly here in a region that values work ethic. (See: “I play when I want to play”). That said, he’s never had any legal issues that we can find. So we ask:

1) How long would Manny Ramirez have lasted in Minnesota before public opinion forced him out? (Our take: five years, tops).

2) When you look at the litany of “Manny Being Manny” moments, do they seem more or less harmless than you remember them?

3) How impressive are these numbers for a right-handed batter never linked to steroids? Is Manny, in fact, the greatest hitter of our generation?

4) If by some small miracle the Red Sox really did trade Manny, and the Twins had a package to offer (think at least one talented outfielder, one starting pitcher and a prospect), would you want them to pursue it? [For those trapped in a well, the Twins are 2.5 games back heading into a key four-game showdown with the White Sox starting tonight at the Metrodome].

Fasola-link! Crick-et?

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