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I am the famous Wang Hao! Does it matter if I beat you?

Posted on October 13th, 2008 – 3:23 PM
By Michael Rand

Try to enhance this story. Go ahead. Just try. From Reuters (we will bold the funniest parts, though they should already be painfully obvious):

China’s national table tennis team will give Olympic medallist Wang Hao counselling after he reportedly got into a fight with a security guard for trying to stop him from urinating outside a karaoke club.
Local media reports last week quoted witnesses as saying that the twice Olympic singles silver medallist had emerged drunk from a karaoke club on Thursday and come to blows with the security guard when he tried to urinate outside the building.
I am the famous Wang Hao! I am the world champion! Does it matter if I beat you?” shouted the 24-year-old, according to a witness quoted by the papers.
China’s national table tennis team played down the incident and said that Wang, who also won a team gold at the Beijing Games, had merely had a heated exchange of words.
“There was no drunkenness or brawling. There was just an argument,” Monday’s Shanghai Morning Post quoted China national team manager Huang Biao as saying.
Because Wang is a celebrity, the story has been amplified.”
Wang, a marquee player in China’s premier table tennis league, would nonetheless face punishment from his army-affiliated club Bayi, the paper said, quoting the club’s coach Wang Tao, without providing further details
.

So yeah.

18 Responses to "I am the famous Wang Hao! Does it matter if I beat you?"

lattewarrior says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:25 pm

“Because Wang is a celebrity, the story has been amplified.”

This is similar to what happened with the Pam Anderson and Tom Lee sex tape.

MR says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:28 pm

China’s premier table tennis league
This needs to be restated. There are enough table tennis leagues for one to be called the “premier” league?

The Hootie says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:30 pm

Mr. Sparkle nods in approval.

Michael Rand says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:35 pm

I have to urinate! Can you see I am serious!

Stu says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:36 pm

His threats to banish the security guard to the land of wind and ghosts must have been edited out of the story.

AZGopherGirl says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:37 pm

Everybody Wang Hao tonight!

Merx says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:38 pm

I urinated in the parking lot of the public library in uptown once.

jama says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:40 pm

Sign of the Apocalypse:

Wang’s are banned from urinating outside.

The Hootie says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:44 pm

In Communist China, Wang beats YOU!

Dave MN says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:44 pm

“There was no drunkenness or brawling. There was just an argument,”

“If you do not acknowledge a tree falling in the woods, it did not actually fall”

- Chinese Proverb 2008

MR says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:46 pm

Even though it’s only Monday, jama has shaken off the rust of the weekend and opened the floodgates to a COW-worthy stream of comments.

jama says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:47 pm

Is this guy China’s response to Pacman Jones?

Dave MN says:

October 13th, 2008 at 3:51 pm

The headline if Chien-Ming Wang and Wang Hao bumped into each other while walking in opposite directions:

“Wangs touch accidentally, leading to awkward moment”

newbie says:

October 13th, 2008 at 4:02 pm

Also from the article:
“It taught me that I have to be very careful about anything I say or do,” Wang told state broadcaster CCTV.

[Redacted] media, scrutinizing every little thing celebrities do. He just wanted to urinate on a building. Can’t these people have lives too?

Dave MN says:

October 13th, 2008 at 4:04 pm

[Redacted] media, scrutinizing every little thing celebrities do. He just wanted to urinate on a building. Can’t these people have lives too?

Newbie, it’s just the gotcha mainstream media. Except in China, the “gotcha” factor is state mandated and whoever slips up in front of a camera mysteriously disappears.

newbie says:

October 13th, 2008 at 4:21 pm

China’s national table tennis team will give Olympic medallist Wang Hao counselling

Excerpt from counseling session:

Counselor: So, what happened?
Wang: I got caught trying to urinate on a building.
Counselor: I see. Had you been drinking?
Wang: Yes.
Counselor: I see. I think I know the problem. Next time you want to go out drinking and urinate on a building… DON’T YELL YOUR NAME, you play ping-pong. Nobody is going to recognize you!!!

Jon says:

October 13th, 2008 at 4:24 pm

In Communist China, Wang beats YOU!

+2, Hootie.

Beavis and Butthead says:

October 13th, 2008 at 5:45 pm

You said Wang! HA ha ha ha