What in the name of Walter Camp is going on? Camp is considered the “father of American football,” but in the version we usually watch, the local teams suffer agonizing and often suspicious losses while their opponents and other nefarious teams skate away with sneaky wins. None of that happened this weekend; again, if we know the majority of our target audience, we know that the Gophers, Badgers, Vikings, Bears, Redskins, Cowboys and Patriots games had a predictable rooting pattern. In five of those games, the team you were rooting for won in heart-pounding, down-to-the-wire fashion; in the other two (Badgers and Patriots), the offending team was routed to the point of embarrassment. Let’s look at three:

*By the end of the Gophers game, there were about 10 guys just standing around, not exercising at all, at our health club. One gentleman watched the final 45 minutes leaning on an elliptical machine next to ours, while we sweated away. Let’s just say that his commentary could be described somewhere between “crazy” and “inane.” (If they really want to cross them up here, they’ll throw a bomb! Yes, that would cross Illinois up, considering all Minnesota needs to do is take one snap, kneel down and the game is over. Element of surprise!) Strangely, we did not have that usual feeling of “here we go again” when Illinois mounted its comeback. Sure, the Gophers were outplayed to an extent, but they were the ones making the biggest plays all game. Sure enough, they made one more. What is this 6-1 team, Tim Brewster, and what have you done with the 1-11 squad of a year ago that was carrying on a grand tradition of excruciating losses?

*We’ll touch on the Vikings more later in the Meltdown (yes, Drew is back this week), but for now we’ll say it was a second consecutive week in which a victory seemed strangely unsatisfying. Even worse, the feeling grew in the Lions game. At least against the Saints, the Vikings made some game-changing plays that gave them a legitimate claim to the victory; on Sunday, they were outplayed by the worst team in football, which was starting a backup quarterback who is unfamiliar with the dimensions of an end zone, and they needed the benefit of two very questionable calls (the fumble and the pass interference) to shake down a win. Ladies and gentlemen, your NFC North c0-leaders! (Brad Childress, by the way, continues to be the last-place coach in the ESPN fan voting. He’s the only coach in the bottom five that has at least a .500 record. If the “Fire Childress” chants didn’t confirm the level of dissatisfaction, perhaps his 9 percent approval rating does).

*Why the squib kick is a terrible idea, by Lovie Smith: The Bears had a huge drive to take a 20-19 lead with 11 seconds left against the Falcons. Should be ballgame, right? Yes, Jama? Agreed? In that situation, on the kickoff, you kick deep. Simple logic: a field goal can still beat you, and the clock is your greatest ally. There’s about, what, a 1 percent chance that a returner brings it all the way back? More likely, he gets stopped at around the 25 or 30 with about 4 or 5 seconds left, or the Falcons try some trickery and the clock runs out. Instead, Robbie Gould nails a low squibber that’s picked up and run back to the 45 with 6 seconds left. Really. From there, one would figure the odds are — what — 8 to 10 percent that a team will be able to execute one play for 25 yards and make a field goal of reasonable length, which is exactly what the Falcons did. Ballgame. Your NFC North co-leaders! The march to 8-8 continues.

Your thoughts on the best and worst of the weekend?

Fasola-link! Crossword inker.

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