Makers of Whizzinator finally brought to justice
Posted on November 26th, 2008 – 12:02 PMBy Michael Rand
To the delight of coaches and perhaps for the greater good of all present and future NFL players, the makers of the Whizzinator — a “device” that ensnared former Vikings RB Onterrio Smith in a web of airport lies — will not be manufacturing their fake members or helping hard-working and harder-partying players pass their drug tests anymore. From BBC News:
The makers of a prosthetic penis to help men cheat on drugs tests have pleaded guilty to two charges of conspiracy in a US federal court.
The two men, George Wills and Robert Catalano, had been selling the device - known as the Whizzinator - over the internet for three years.
The device was sold with a heating element and fake urine to help people test negative for illegal substances.
They could face up to eight years in prison and a $500,000 (£334,000) fine.
The men ran an internet company known as Puck Technology, which between 2005 and 2008 sold the Whizzinator and a similar device, known as Number One.
“The Whizzinator is the ultimate solution for a drug testing device,” says a statement on the website of the California-based company, which calls itself the “undisputed leader in synthetic urine.”
“The prosthetic penis is very realistic and concealing is simple, while our quality production and materials assures you that the Whizzinator will let it flow again and again, anytime, anywhere you need it!”
Rest easy, Onterrio Raymond Lloyd Smith. You were merely a pawn in this game. You were duped into buying an illegal product. Vindication is almost as sweet and golden as a gorgeous bag of fake urine.
5 Responses to "Makers of Whizzinator finally brought to justice"
In a corner somewhere sits R. Kelly. Crying of course because he’ll have to pee on 16 year old girls’ faces the old fashioned way.
I really hate to see someones entrepeneurial spirit quashed like this. Their ingenuity should be an inspiration in these dark times. We need more of this “can-do” attitude and less party-poopers like the government. How are business going to thrive and pay their taxes if we can throw in a few shady schemes?
Last sentence should read: How are businesses going to thrive and pay their taxes if we can’t throw in a few shady schemes?
What the [redacted] did Rand do?
“What the [redacted] did Rand do?”
Hogan vs. Warrior = Ali vs. Foreman
More Rock vs. Less Talk = More Stu/Rocket Haiku vs. Less P3
