We will start with some news that might shock you: only two teams in the NBA are hotter than the Timberwolves right now. Yes, you heard that right. Minnesota won its third consecutive game last night — its first three-game winning streak in almost two years — and only Detroit (seven consecutive victories) and Denver (four) can claim to be on a greater roll than that. With OKC on the docket tonight — at 5-30, the Thunder have the league’s worst record — Minnesota is in position to dream of a fourth consecutive victory. Remember, we will be charting Brian Cardinal’s every move tonight. It will be so intense that a restraining order will be the only logical result.

*Remember Joel Przybilla? Sure you do. Monticello kid. Former Gophers player. Butted heads with Dan Monson. Didn’t get along with KG. Well, he was fined $7,500 the other day for his role in an NBA fight. His grandmother, though, is going to ensure the fight lingers on. From the Oregonian, via Sports by Brooks (and sent in by Toonces51):

Remember the movie “Shawshank Redemption”, where Andy Dufresne wrote a letter every week to the state to get books for the prison library? Well, the same concept is underway with the grandmother of Blazers center Joel Przybilla. The octogenarian plans to write NBA commissioner David Stern a series of letters complaining about the $7,500 fine Przybilla received for his part in an altercation with New Orleans center Tyson Chandler on Friday. “She said she is going to keep writing Stern until she hears back from him,” Przybilla said smiling. “And believe me, she will.”

Update: The story has been advanced via intrepid reporting work by our own Paul Walsh.

*The LeBron James “crab dribble” saga (that’s apparently a real thing) wouldn’t have been nearly as funny without the Wizards players poking fun at it. Said Caron Butler: “Crab dribble’ is when you, uh, travel. That’s the hottest thing on the market right now.”

*And finally, the greatest thing ever. You might mock or doubt the crab dribble, but you should never do such a thing to The Bacon Explosion. Ingredients: 2 pounds thick cut bacon; 2 pounds Italian sausage; 1 jar of your favorite barbeque sauce; 1 jar of your favorite barbeque rub. Some of the key maneuvers: To kick off the construction of this pork medley you’ll need to create a 5×5 bacon weave. And: Now that you’re pork is well seasoned, it’s time to add more pork. Read the step-by-step instructions right here, complete with visual aids. Then tell us 1) how ridiculously delicious and unhealthy it looks and 2) what is the craziest, most delicious thing you have ever made for yourself?

Fasola-link! TV News music theme history.

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