A vote for Molly Oberstar is a vote for full lips, long legs
Posted on January 20th, 2009 – 12:52 PMBy Michael Rand
Colleague Rachel Blount passes along a tip about Molly Oberstar, a Duluth native and one of three Minnesota women competing in the U.S. Figure Skating Championships. In the course of her column about local skaters, she had no room for this tidbit: Oberstar has entered Mpls. St. Paul Mag’s “Real Model” contest and is one of 12 women up for vote right now. Rachel thought that might be of some interest to RandBall readers; we agreed. Now, obviously Oberstar is interested in far more than just being really, really, really ridiculously good looking. As Blount notes, Oberstar is a back-to-back skating champion at the senior women’s event at the Midwestern Sectionals. But she also doesn’t seem to be particularly shy about promoting her other talents. Per her entry on the contest page (photo via that page as well):
I have physical attributes that would qualify me to be a real model. I am 5-feet-8-inches tall with a slender build that is toned by fifteen years of competing in the sport of figure skating. My eyes are large, my lips full, my legs long. Many have told me that I should be a model. Some have even told me that I have an exotic, European look. Beyond appearances, I have a natural affinity for expression. Figure skating has trained my body to move in myriad ways—from graceful to athletic—and my face to portray a wide range of emotions.
[Undoes necktie*. Unbottons top button of shirt**. Wonders who turned up the thermostat***].
*Necktie? Wearing pants is dressing up.
**Shows what you know. This is a fake tuxedo T-shirt, suckers.
***Nobody would ever do that here. Put on a sweater! It’s a recession!
15 Responses to "A vote for Molly Oberstar is a vote for full lips, long legs"
I have physical attributes that would qualify me to be a real model a “Before” picture. I am 5-feet-8-inches tall with a slender doughy build that is toned by fifteen years of competing in the sport of figure skating sitting in front of a computer screen. My eyes are large bloodshot, my lips full chapped, my legs long could be mistaken for uncooked bratwurst. Many have Mom has told me that I should be a model move out, maybe talk to a girl. Some have even told me that I have an exotic, European look odor. Beyond appearances, I have a natural affinity for expression yelling at the TV when something on it displeases me. Figure skating A diet of Big Macs and Milwaukee’s Best has trained my body to move in myriad ways—from graceful to athletic— like a ball of chunky peanut butter and bacon fat, rolling slowly downhill, and my face to portray a wide range of emotions life gone completely, utterly to waste.
/Access Vikings’d
Stu just won today’s internets.
Yeah, but did Stu vote?
+1, also.
Finally, some Oberstar pork I can get behind.
Michael: I voted for the one from Blaine. I bet she’s handy with an arcwelder and will let me know if Dale Jr. beat that sumbitch Gordon.
Nice, Stu.
Figure skating has trained my body to move in myriad ways
Somewhere Joker’s head exploded at the numerous possible comebacks for this one.
Also Joker, if this newspaper thing doesn’t pan out for Mr. Randball, you guys should buy a bar!
OFF-TOPIC: If it’s Tuesday, that must mean Clear Channel is letting people go.
off topic…goodbye Mr. Chad Hartman. Another example of getting rid of the employee with the biggest paycheck? bad move.
Stu is getting respect over in the Deadspin comments.
/Access Vikings’d
NOT ENUF CAPITUL LETTURS
Stu,
Deadspin is calling you, they want to offer you a job. Whatever you do, make sure to avoid the figs.
Clearly, I need to drink on lunch more often.
Models are not supposed to be modest. That’s like a quarterback that can’t pass the ball. So what if *she* tells us what she has. It’s not like some of you weren’t in your bunks thinking the same thing.
Stu, you are my hero.
