This is how we Stu it. Stu?

—————

Name: Chuck Person

Nickname: The Rifleman. This was not because of his propensity to shoot, but rather his mother naming him Chuck Connors Person after the star of old school TV’s The Rifleman. You were too young to watch that show in your mother’s basement, but you no doubt enjoyed the hard-boiled gravitas he brought to Airplane 2.

Claim to Fame, Minnesota: the Timberwolves acquired Person in 1992, along with Micheal Williams’ plantar fascia, for Sam Mitchell and Pooh Richardson. In his time here, he somehow failed to click with Christian Laettner, calling him out in the media more than once.

Claim to Fame, Everywhere Else: was the NBA Rookie of the Year in 1987. I did not remember that. I did remember that he and Charles Barkley were teammates on a very potent Auburn team back in 1984. In addition, he made the mistake of trash-talking Larry Bird in 1991: “Bird told Person before a game that he had a present for him. In the fourth quarter, after hitting a clutch 3-pointer, Bird turned to Person, who was seated on the Pacers’ bench, and said, ‘Merry Christmas.’”

Where He Is Now: was most recently an assistant coach for the Sacramento Kings before being fired in December 2008. [Proprietor note: Shouldn’t have hitched his wagon to Hang Time].

Glorious Randomness: it being the internet, of course there’s a YouTube tribute to Chuck Person. It being the internet, of course it’s soundtracked by Kris Kross.

[Note: That Flickr image is apparently a Chuck Person bobblehead doll making an appearance at some sort of Chick-fil-A-themed press conference].

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