The big question: Who will win Miss Beer Cart 2009?
Posted on July 6th, 2009 – 11:09 AMBy Michael Rand
We’re not entirely sure if Miss Beer Cart is an event unique to Wisconsin, but we are pretty sure it is. Wait, did we say Miss Beer Cart? Yes we did. And what exactly is it? Well, let’s go to the official web site for guidance (our bold, as usual):
The Miss Beer Cart Pageant is a competition designed to find the Best Beer Cart Driver in the State of Wisconsin. Drivers are nominated to compete in the competition. Once entered, drivers compete against one another in different events that involve speed and neatness on the beer cart, driving tests that include speed, agility and accuracy and also a question and answer session with our selected judges. Before the event begins, a long drive competition is held between the beer cart drivers. This is done on an amphitheater like setting on the first tee. Once the event begins, each driver gets her turn on the beverage cart. Votes are tallied during dinner based upon pre-round competitions, long drive challenge and service during the event. The day’s work is capped with the presentation of Miss Beer Cart Wisconsin.
That image? That’s a thumbnail of Brittany, a beverage cart worker from Ironwood Golf Course. She entered in 2008. Why did we pick her? That’s just how we are.
But how are the contestants picked? There must be some sort of weeding out process, no? Ah, thanks to Stensation and the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel, we know that NEXT WEEK will be that very thing.
Speed cart stocking and Bloody Mary mixing will be among the skills on display July 14 in the preliminaries for the 2009 Miss Beer Cart Wisconsin Pageant Tournament. The preliminaries will be held at McGillycuddy’s Bar & Grill, 1135 N. Water St. The event will be open to the public (must be 21 to attend). Contestants from throughout the state will compete to become finalists in the Miss Beer Cart Wisconsin Pageant Tournament.
And that tournament? It’s Aug. 7 at Scenic View Country Club in Slinger, Wis., which is a little northwest of Milwaukee. $99 gets you 18 holes of golf and a cart, lunch and dinner as well as a fascinating time machine back to 1959, where women were judged solely on their ability to look good and perform tasks for men. Whee! (Also known as: Wisconsin subculture). We are now accepting guest post applications.
16 Responses to "The big question: Who will win Miss Beer Cart 2009?"
anything that has the words “miss”, “beer”, and “pageant” can’t be all bad. Maybe RandBall can become a future sponsor of the event, or maybe start a Minnesota version. I figure anything Wisconsin can do Minnesota can do better.
I have to imagine the Minnesota version would have fewer pregnant contestants getting tagged with OUIs.
Also, any female who has to fend off the advances of drunken businessmen and can make a decent Bloody Mary absolutely deserves recognition. I applaud Wisconsin’s effort.
I see they have changed their process. I believe last year the winner was chosen only on looks. The feminists must have gotten to them.
Being that it’s in Wisconsin, is one of the requirements having all of your teeth? Or being able to chug a beer in under 30 seconds?
I would ask where is the swimsuit part of the competition, but then I remember we are talking about Wisconson…so nevermind
Guest Post Application:
Name: Bethany Polaski-Skluzacekski
Golf Course: Stiffwiener Golf Course, Milwaukee WI
Motto: “You never ask a navy man if he’ll have another drink, because it’s nobody’s goddamned business how much he’s had already.”
In a “mentioned for whatever it’s worth” post … and it’s not worth much … Barb Franke, who held the University of Wisconsin women’s basketball career scoring record until last year, used to also be a beer-cart girl at University Ridge Golf Course during her days with the Badgers. If Franke is still a beer-cart girl now, I guess it means things didn’t quite work out for her pro basketball career.
extra points for discrete tattoos, lots of extra points for large ones (tattoos.)
For those who would bash Wisconsin over Miss Beer Cart…..I’d rather have Wisc’s liquor laws than the idiotic, conservative liquor laws in Minn.
I believe the Miss Beer Cart winner is presented with one of the Packer’s NFL Championship trophies. GB has so many that they can just give them away. Maybe that’s why Mini-soda doesn’t have this fine event. Cheers!
We’re not worthy in Wisconsin…Obviously we can’t compete with Minnesota. I can’t wait until Playboy’s ‘Women of the Iron Range’ issue comes out. Some real hotties up there… Not to mention all the sweet spandex babes workin’ all the Casey’s General Stores from Brainard all the way to Moorhead.
Disco~
I agree with you, but if MN changed their liqure laws we would have even more drunken ’sconies here.
Ahhhhhh…. Minnesota Nice! The “nice” part must be Wisonsin-code for [unprintable].
What a bunch of charm-school grads you are. Pat yourselves on the back.
Doesn’t it seem a bit odd that the “fine folks” from Minnesota don’t seem to complain about Wisconsin when they head over to Cadott, Eau Claire, Chippewa Falls, LaCrosse, etc. I guess a few good beers tends to mellow them out. It’s certainly not as bad as going stone-cold sober “up Nort” and watching the Duluthaloes come roaming in off the Range.
Sure Navy, cuz there’s so much to do in Cadott, Eau Claire, Chippewa Falls and Lacrosse! Get real. We know you guys in WI need to have the beer goggles on when going out to the bars cow tippin in those towns you just mentioned. I guess that’s why all you Cheeseheads need to live in MN.
What’s all this talk of beer in Wisconsin? I thought Thompson’s Water Seal was their beverage of choice…
