Britney Spears will not be part of the halftime festivities at this year’s Super Bowl, thanks in part to the fact that computer literate teenage boys across the world have seen the place her babies came from. (NY Daily News, via The Big Lead). But hey, Tom Brady should have no worries if he makes it to the big game again. Apparently, he’s a hit with supermodel Gisele Bundchen (though we’re still not sure what threshold one has to cross to go from “model” to “supermodel.”) And if this youtube clip can be trusted, Tom wears underpants. (This clip contains material that might be considered “PG-13″ in a movie setting. Use your own discretion).

Barry Bonds said he didn’t get his illicit drugs from Mark Sweeney, which was nice of him. He did not, however, deny a report that indicated he tested positive for amphetamines.

Too bad, he would have looked good in purple: Chiefs tight end Tony Gonzalez has signed a five-year extension to say with Kansas City.

A meter is a size: Yao, the big Rockets center, denied an internet report that he has dated 5-foot-2 actress Nia Long. And he did it in classic style: “I saw the news on Internet. The writer is so good at hoaxes. She’s only 1.57m. I’m 2.26m. Does it sound reasonable?”

But apparently the Rockets’ 7-6 center has a thing for Nia Long, an actress perhaps best known for her work on “Fresh Prince of Bel Air” (that is, of course, unless you’re a fan of the Big Momma movies). Hey, she shares a birthday with RandBall, though she’s six years older. Annnnnyway, Yao is smitten with the 5-2 actress, and it says here they’ve been on a few dates already and that “sparks are flying.” We could say something here about low post moves, but that would just be wrong.

This one’s going out to all the ladies in RandBall land: Patriots QB Tom Brady, whom we’re told is a good looking guy, has parted company with his actress girlfriend Bridget Moynahan. He’s 29, has won three Super Bowls and enjoys systematically shredding the Vikings defense on Monday Night Football as well as long walks on the beach. Let’s just say we don’t expect ol’ Tom to wind up on match.com wondering why he can’t find a soulmate.