We’re getting back to our roots here with some hard-hitting journalism. Ladies and gentlemen, we present you with a Q&A session featuring Joe V., chief surgeon in the attempted extraction of Isiah Thomas and Joe Dolan from the body of the New York Knicks. He is on a mission to “Fire Isiah” and “Dump Dolan.” He took time out from his life work to answer a few questions from RandBall.

RandBall: When did you start this crusade and why?

Joe V.: This crusade was started about 2 weeks ago to the day of the protest. The truth is I have reached a point and am so fed up with the consistent inconsistencies that I felt it was needed to step up and try to do something. I’m a small fish in a big pond but still a die-hard Knick fan that has reached the point of breaking. I guess my thought was, “do something to be able to say you tried to be a part of the solutuion.” In the end, all you can say is you tried as you watch your team get pounded every 3 games or so.

RB: What is your day job?

JV: I am part of the remains of the mortgage industry implosion. In between careers and industries. Trying to find my way. I guess you could say I had a little time on my hands.

RB: There’s another protest scheduled for Sunday at 11 a.m. outside of MSG. What do you expect to happen at this time, and will there be a prize for best sign?

JV: We will descend on MSG and lead our loyal and disgruntled fans. We can only hope that we gain as much negative exposure for this Knicks organization while also providing an opportunity for people to donate a clothing item towards a great cause, the NYC Homeless Shelters.

RB: Considering how they have dropped the ball in running the Knicks, how symbolic would it be for Isiah Thomas and James Dolan to handle the New Year’s Eve festivities at Times Square?

JV: Not only would it be fitting but they would probably do it, if invited, not realizing the comical irony of the whole thing until later. Just like all of thier other decisions.

RB: Have you ever been involved in a lawsuit that cost your employer more than $11 million?

JV: Can’t say that I have. In fact, I think most of us can pretty much assume that if we did, we probably wouldn’t have that job either. I think the only person that could get away with that would have to be Tom Cruise’s character in Wall Street.

RB: If Isiah Thomas coached against Mike Ditka in a professional ice hockey contest, what would the final score be and what would transpire in the game?

JV: The final score would be 0-0 since neither can probably play hockey. Both would realize it and Ditka would kick the crap out of Isiah to pass the time.
RB: Once this Isiah thing happens, any chance you want to move to the Twin Cities and work your magic here?

JV: Everything has a price I guess. I have wondered if it were possible to do this full time.

So we’ve been telling you about this book for a while. In the interest of full disclosure, the author was the best man at our wedding and has been a partner in causing general mayhem for about 18 years. So we would have been foisting it upon you regardless of its quality. But fear not: “My Least Favorite Team is My Favorite Team: How the Minnesota Vikings Have Made Me Hate Every Team in Professional Football,” is not only one of the longest titles you will ever find, it is also a must-read for anybody who has ever felt an undying rage against the Purple but couldn’t find the words to express that rage. This book — in which the author musters up hate for all 32 NFL teams based on Vikings-related outcomes throughout the years — cuts to the bone of that rage in an often very funny and meaningful way. It is out now via the link above or at Amazon.com. In one of the easiest interviews we have ever procured, we caught up with Mr. Keith Richotte for a Q&A recently. Please do enjoy.

RB: This book seems a little crazy. Are you crazy?
KR: It reminds me of an old family saying (and rest assured, my family is very familiar with the topic), “The definition of insanity is to repeat the same action over and over again and to expect different results.” So, if every year I keep watching the Vikings and hoping and expecting them to win a
Super Bowl, well then …

RB: “My least favorite team …” was written in an obsolete vernacular. Discuss.
KR: Wildcat … Wildcat. Wrooowr. I gotta go.

RB: But seriously, how did you muster up the knowledge and hate for all 31 teams?
KR: That would be 32 teams. In any event, I mustered up this knowledge and hate by watching this team with a surprisingly unwavering fidelity for over a quarter of a century. There was some research involved to make sure my blinding rage didn’t obscure some of the facts. Other than that, it all comes from an angry heart’s wounded memories.

RB: How long did it take you to finish this project, and why did you even start it?
KR: As any true Vikings fan can imagine, the words flowed freely as if a muse were whispering in my ear as I typed. It was a very easy book to write. I started it in the middle of last season and finished it in the middle of the summer. It would not have nearly taken me as long as it did were it not for the fact that I had some other important projects going on. I actually first decided to start writing it because one night I couldn’t get to sleep and I began thinking about the Vikings. Then, as if struck by a lightning bolt, I came up with a hypothesis. Did I hate every team in the NFL because of something they have done to the Minnesota Vikings? At first it seemed ludicrous. Did I really hate teams like the Chargers, Seahawks, and Texans? The next day I sat down and began writing to find out if my hypothesis is true. Turns out it is.

RB: Explain the decision to self-publish.
KR: It was the quickest way to get the book out to the public. As soon as I figured out that I hated every team in the NFL and could come up with a reason why, I knew that there were other Vikings fans just like me. The bottom line is that it is not all that much fun being a Vikings fan. I have an addiction to the Minnesota Vikings, as do several other folks out there. I needed to let folks know, in the most scathingly humorous manner possible, that they are not alone.

RB: Do you feel the need to update the Lions, Chiefs and Packers part merely after 4 weeks this season?
KR: As I stated, I began the book in the middle of the last season. As such, there is not as much about the Childress era as there should be. I would be lying if I were to claim that I have not already considered a second edition. Having noted that, if you hated Mike Tice, you will enjoy this book.

RB: Who are your top 3 and bottom 3 all-time favorite and least-favorite Vikings players?
KR: Top three in no particular order — Alan Page, Joey Browner, and Randy Moss. Bottom three in no particular order — Spergeon Wynn, Jeff Brady, and Randy Moss.

RB: Daunte Culpepper is the personification of this franchise. Discuss.
KR: Daunte gets his due in the book as well. Basically, he is the epitome of the Denny Green and Mice Tice eras. He has (or maybe “had” nowadays) a healthy amount of talent that he brought to the offensive side of the team, but some seriously poor decisionmaking on and off the field destroyed a seemingly limitless amount of potential. Plus, he had small, girlish hands.

RB: Tell me again where I can buy this book.
KR: The best place to get it is at myleastfavoriteteam.com. It is also available on Amazon, but I don’t make as much money if you buy it there. If you have any inkling of the misery that is being a Vikings fan (or if you know anyone who does) you will like the book. I promise.

A certain writer here claims Simmons was in the “Page 2 Holy Trinity” when it came to references, along with Craig Finn and Chuck Klosterman. Well, we already repeated the Klosterman Q&A a while back. The Finn repeat is coming tomorrow. That leaves BS right about now. This originally ran Aug. 31, 2006:

Saying Bill Simmons is a sports columnist for ESPN.com is like saying “Fight Club” is a movie about fighting. Both statements are true, but — if this makes sense — not entirely accurate. Though he is known by the moniker “The Sports Guy,” Simmons is just as likely to spin off on a 1,000-word tangent on “The O.C.” as he is to break  down the various missteps of Isiah Thomas. His non-traditional style and various pop culture references have endeared him to  countless loyal readers. He recently took a break from shamelessly promoting his Red Sox-themed book “Now I Can Die in Peace” to answer some questions from the Star Tribune.

Q. Let’s start somewhat serious. You were at the forefront of the Internet sports columnist revolution, and many people probably owe their jobs to you. Going back to your days in Boston before ESPN, what did you hope to accomplish with your column?

A. Wow, that’s nice of you to say. I’d like to think that the revolution would have happened anyway, but I’m happy to have led the charge. I always knew what kind of sports column I wanted to write — I wanted to talk about the stuff my friends and I were talking about, wanted to write from the fan’s perspective, wanted to stand out from the newspaper/radio guys … wanted to try all different kinds of ideas and styles and wanted to involve my readers as much as possible so they felt like they had a stake in what was happening. And I think it worked. I’m proud of how it turned out. Sometimes I feel like I was in the right place in the right time, other times I feel proud because there was no role model/blueprint for what I was trying to do. The hardest thing was building a readership just on word of mouth with my old website. Now it’s easy: You can start a blog in five minutes, write something interesting and one of the bigger blogs will link to you and send you all their traffic. In the late 90’s, I only had word of mouth.

Q. It’s been said you are the “anti-sportswriter.” But the same qualities that some might say make you “unprofessional” — your open biases, constant pop culture references and conversational tone, for instance — seem to be the reason you have such a loyal readership. Have newspapers and magazines had it wrong all these years?

A. Yeah, I think so. The goal of any writer or columnist is to make sports more fun to follow. It doesn’t matter how you do it. When I had my old “Boston Sports Guy” site, the newspaper/radio guys disparaged it because I wasn’t paying my dues. … Wait, I can’t have opinions about sports and write them down? I’m not allowed to do that? I never understood that logic. If anything, not having press passes made me come up with more creative ways of coming up with columns, and I think that’s what you’re seeing in the Internet Era now. … We also have more space on the Internet. For instance, this interview was 10 times funnier until your editors chopped the hell out of it. (Editor’s note: Watch your back, Simmons).

Q. Your beloved Red Sox won the World Series. So did the White Sox. The Cubs, you might say, are cursed. I just say they’re bad. The question, then, is this: Is there any team/fan base that has had a tougher past 40 years than the Minnesota Vikings?

A. I’d say the Browns, Saints or Bills had it worse - the Bills lost four straight Super Bowls, the Saints only have one playoff win in 30 years and the Browns actually lost their team. That’s tough to top. My best friend is a Vikes fan so I’m extremely sympathetic to them — I even watched the Darrin Nelson Game with him — but they’ve at least been competitive over the past 30 years. Plus, you guys get to dress up like 14th century Vikings for games and stuff. That’s always fun.

Q. What is your advice to a fantasy football owner who is drafting No. 4 this year?

A. I don’t know … it’s a conundrum. You’re probably better off trading down to the No. 9 or No. 10 pick. I mean, I’d take Manning at No. 4; at least I know I’m getting a sure thing. I don’t trust any of those running backs. By the way, I am slowly becoming convinced that fantasy football is driving us all crazy — you have a 1-in-12 chance of winning, guys always get hurt, the swings from week to week are just too nuts, everyone has two or three complete morons in their league who somehow cause a controversy every year. There’s just a lot of stress. With that said, I’m in two leagues and can’t wait.

Q. How many fantasy football leagues is too many?

A. More than two and you will go off the deep end. It’s not healthy. It really isn’t. I’m all about having two of things — I have two dogs and two cars, I’m always in two fantasy leagues regardless of the sport, I have two laptops, I’m planning on having two kids, and eventually, I’d like to have two wives at the same time. Wait, did I just say that out loud?

Q. You recently wrote that you worry Las Vegas is becoming a cliche because too many people have caught onto it. Could the same thing happen to fantasy football? Too many people playing, oversaturation, endless stories of some idiot splitting jacks/catching a straight on the river/winning a playoff game because Tiki Barber couldn’t get 2 more rushing yards.

A. No, because my life isn’t affected by any other football fantasy league except for the two I’m in. But when I’m in Vegas, and it’s packed to the gills, and I’m waiting 45 minutes for a cab line and losing blackjack hands because the moron next to me decided to split threes against a 10, my life is affected. Negatively.

Q. Speaking of Vegas, I was there during the World Series of Poker, but I stayed clear of it. Now I can live vicariously through you: What was it like to play in the event, and would you do it again?

A. It was awesome … right up until the part when some Internet butthead knocked me out when I had an 85 percent chance of winning the hand. I would absolutely do it again. When else do you get the chance to wear sunglasses indoors without looking like a lunatic?

Q. If you had to start a heavy metal band (lead singer, guitarist, bass, drums) using one player from each of the NFL, NBA, MLB and NHL, who would you choose? (Bonus if you can come up with a keytar player from the PGA Tour).

A. Who are you, Barbara Walters? Interesting question, though. I would pick Jonathan Papelbon as the lead singer — he’s intense, he’s young, and he’d wear weird outfits. Clinton Portis would be the guitar player; he’s also crazy and likes attention. I’d have Robert Horry as the bass guy, because he likes being in the background and always makes his teams better. And as my drummer, you’d have to pick the NHL player because I retired as a fan in the 90’s after Jeremy Jacobs and Harry Sinden destroyed the Bruins. As for the golfer on the keytar, John Daly. Obviously.
Question: Answer that last question. Or discuss anything else amongst yourselves. Your choice.

We probably received as much feedback on this Q&A as any interview we did. That’s not always a good thing; in this case, it was. This ran not too terribly long ago — Jan. 18, 2007. Note that Robinson has since led the Gophers to their third NCAA team title.

J Robinson loves quotations. He loves them so much that he has some of his favorites taped to the desk in his office, while others are scribbled on notes stuck to his computer. They are like little pieces of him, scattered everywhere. Robinson, the Gophers wrestling coach, believes strongly in a lot of things. But if any quotation defines him more than all others, it is the one he repeated early in a conversation this week: “Good is the enemy of great.” He believes success is a choice; indeed, he believes
everything in life is a choice. His choice has been to take a program nobody thought could be a winner and turn it into one of the best in the country. He talked about that and other things with the Star Tribune.

Q - When you came here in 1986, there had been some past individual success with the wrestling program, but it was by no means elite. I’m sure this answer could be a book, and not a paragraph, but what are some of the fundamentals you believe made Gophers wrestling an elite program?

A - You condense it down, and there is a great quote that goes something like, “Everyone wants great success without great effort.” You need three things. Vision: You have to know where you’re going to go. That pretty much dictates everything else you want to do. If you want to climb Mount Everest as opposed to Mount Shasta, a 14,000-footer in California, those are two completely different paths. You define what you want to be, and that in turn defines what you want to do. Then you need a plan. Most people don’t have a plan. And the last thing you need is leadership, which requires the courage to implement the plan. That’s very hard because most people are afraid to make the hard calls. People say they will, but in the world of political correctness, people buckle under.

Q - But it’s one thing to have a philosophy. How do you translate words and ideas to victories?

A - What makes the horse who won worth $100 million and another who finished second nothing? He doesn’t beat him by 14 lengths, he wins by a nose. But he wins by a nose every time. To get that 2 percent every time might require an extra 40 hours of work a week. The last 2 percent is the hardest, and that’s the one that separates it all out. That’s where you go from good to great. But that’s where it requires more effort. That’s what you’re here to do as a coach. That’s what you’re here to instill in people.

Q - You say 40 extra hours. Do you literally work 80 hours a week?

A - I got here at 6:30 this morning, so that will be at least 12 hours today. It’s not just me. It’s Marty Morgan. It’s Joe Russell. It’s Brandon Eggum. There’s another great quote: “Sometimes your best isn’t good enough. Sometimes you have to do what’s required.” You can always do more.

Q - You believe that?

A - Yeah. Life is very simple. Most people know what to do to be successful. You can go to a high school right now and ask any kid what it takes to get an “A,” and they know exactly what they have to do. But sometimes they choose not to do it. Life is all about choices. I don’t want to spend five years on a one-year problem. It doesn’t mean I won’t have problems in five years, but I don’t want to have the same problem. … We get to choose everything. It all comes down to choice, but the beauty of it is, God gives us the power to choose.

Q - So you really think being a successful wrestling coach, or having any sort of successful team, is no more than a choice?

A - I don’t process what people tell me. I process what people do. Everyone wants to believe what everyone else says, but I don’t. What you do is where you really are. It’s very simple. Life is simple. But it’s hard to be successful. Most people know what it takes to be great, but they choose not to. When we came here in 1986, nobody believed we could win, but you can. You can do anything anywhere. There’s a formula for success. It’s not about facilities or anything like that. Those are things that we focus on when we get distracted.

Q - The U just hired a new football coach. Can the football team be successful here?

A - I don’t really want to get into football. But what about this: John Anderson wins in baseball, and look how bad his facility is. What does that tell you about John Anderson? He’s a winner.

Q - Switching gears a little, in the past 10 years you’ve won two NCAA titles, finished second four times and third twice. This year’s team seems to have a great shot at winning it all again. Did you find it harder to get to the top initially or to stay there?

A - The object is to get to the top and stay there, so that when all the stars line up, they’ll go your way once in a while. You’re always close. You’re always there. So if someone else stumbles, or you have your day like we did in 2001, it goes your way. It’s harder to do it every year. Just like us this year.

Q - Do you feel like your thought process leads you to recruit differently than other coaches?

A - What you do is, you find out what you want in a recruit. Some coaches look at statistics. For us, we look at that, but we also look more at, does the kid love wrestling? Does he want to be great? Putting heart and intensity in people? That’s hard to do. If you can find those things first, you can teach the other things. We want the guy who’s driven to be good with great effort.

Q - Have you always taken this sort of philosophical approach to coaching and life, or are these things that have evolved over the years?

A - I think everybody is a project in motion. You find things and as you get older, you put a philosophy together. … We live in a world trying to make us different than who we are. You get some core values. Discipline, sacrifice, dedication and hard work. … People have it backwards. They talk about wanting to be happy, but life is all about finding your purpose. If you find your purpose, you will be happy in life. When you have a reason to get up, you will always be happy.

The owner of the Dallas Mavericks needs little introduction. We did this Q&A over e-mail and ran it on April 27, 2006. Some of the questions might seem outdated. Some of the answers are timeless:

Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban made his fortune through
technology and the Internet. He writes a blog
(www.blogmaverick.com) and served up frozen treats for a day after saying the NBA’s director of officials, Ed Rush, wasn’t fit to
manage a Dairy Queen. As Dallas faces Memphis in the playoffs, Cuban is sure to be there courtside, yelling like any other fan. Needless to say Cuban, 47, is not your average owner of a major professional sports team. He recently took some time to explain himself to the Star Tribune.

Q - I enjoy reading your blog, primarily because it is far more frank than a lot of other ones out there done by people “in the spotlight.” What is your motivation for writing it, and do you ever worry about letting the public too far into your thoughts?

A - It’s a chance for me to take a stand on issues, whether in sports, technology, media or entertainment, which I enjoy. It’s also an opportunity for me to throw out ideas and get feedback, which can be very valuable from a business perspective. Finally, it’s a great antidote to media and interviews. Since I do all my interviews by e-mail, it keeps reporters honest knowing I can post an entire e-mail thread.

Q - You seem to have a polarizing personality — I hear equal parts “I wish Mark Cuban would just shut up” and “Mark Cuban is the best.” Why do you think people have such strong reactions toward you?

A - Some people pay attention to content and some people pay attention to sound bites. Usually the sports sound bites aren’t complimentary, but it’s all some people need to form an opinion of me. I’m fine either way.

Q - Earlier this season, you called Phil Jackson your “bucket boy.” Where does that rank on your personal highlight list?

A - It’s not a highlight, but it was fun.

Q - Speaking of poking fun, you have also prodded the commissioner more than a few times — and paid the fines to prove it. How would you describe the relationship between yourself and Mr. Stern?

A - We get along great. He knows that I work harder than any other owner to understand the intricacies of the NBA from a financial and operational standpoint, and that can only lead to positives. I’m not always as patient as he would like, but I also think he realizes that when I uncover things that hadn’t been considered, challenge conventional wisdom or offer new ideas, even if I push hard or publicly, good things happen. All of that is good for the NBA, our customers and fans.

Q - Not counting the Maloof brothers in Sacramento, do you think you have more fun than any other NBA owner?

A - It’s not even close. And Joe and Gavin are in the running only because they own the hottest casino in Vegas and hang out with starlets who drink cosmopolitans by the bucket.

Q - Does it make any sense to you that the Clippers, by virtue of losing to the Grizzlies and finishing with a worse record, were rewarded by having home-court advantage against the Nuggets while Memphis had to go on the road against your Mavs?

A - Of course not. That rule will be changed. You never want the incentive of losing in the NBA. It’s the reason why the draft lottery was changed to a weighted lottery.

Q - You made an impassioned plea for Dirk Nowitzki to win this year’s MVP award. Politicking aside, was this year’s race as wide open as any you’ve seen for a while?

A - Without question. The entire league is as wide open as any season for years. Any number of teams could play Cinderella and win it all.

Q - One of the main criticisms of the NBA from many people, including myself, is that it often feels like players are just going through the motions until the fourth quarter. What are your thoughts on the matter?

A - That’s crazy. If you think Kevin Garnett or Dirk Nowitzki is waiting until the fourth quarter to turn it on, you haven’t seen the things I have at halftime. Guys in pain with tears rolling down their cheeks, getting retaped just to get back in the game, getting sick and throwing up and getting back up and going back in the game. Ninety-nine percent of the players in the league have incredible amounts of pride and competitive spirit. The ones who don’t find themselves bouncing from team to team until they are out of the league. Coaches, owners, fans and GMs won’t tolerate lack of effort.

Q - You were an executive producer of “Good Night, and Good Luck,” a terrific film in this writer’s humble opinion. How did you get involved with that project?

A - George Clooney came to my partner and asked if we would finance it. We brought in Jeff Skoll and the three of us financed and produced the film. It was an amazing project by an amazing guy. George doesn’t get the credit he deserves. We have another great movie coming out called “Akeelah and the Bee.” And we also have “One Last Thing.”

Q - Finally, and I’m sure you get tired of this, but it seems every online biography of you mentions how you worked your way through college by giving disco dancing lessons. I think that would be one of the greatest jobs ever. Was it?

A - Let’s put it this way: I couldn’t find a single thing wrong with getting paid $25 an hour to teach sorority girls how to dance. Bring back disco!