We begin today with alert reader Cory, who has something to share:

Can you put something out there to let everyone know that left turns on a red light if you’re turning onto [another] one-way street are legal? I leave my parking ramp each day and I have to take 3 left turns to get back to 35, [and] I honk my horn at least once every day because some idiot is sitting in the far left lane with their blinker on staring at the red light as no traffic goes by. … I get held up each day because of these knuckleheads.

Roadguy tries not to get too annoyed with drivers who aren’t actually breaking any laws, but he feels Cory’s pain – it’s no fun to sit behind a car that could be moving, especially when you’re trying to get home. (On the way to work, it’s somehow less bothersome.)

Our next bit of correspondence arrived last week from an emphatic reader we’ll call Peeved:

Last night, I saw a woman driving an SUV on northbound 35W lighting a cigarette around County Road E. She took a total of 2½ minutes to enjoy the cigarette, then threw it out the window of her truck. As appalled as I was, I had no idea that she’d actually light up another cigarette just 2 minutes later, and do exactly the same thing! … After finishing the second cigarette, she actually lit a third, and after sucking the last bit of brown crap from it, threw it out the window too!! She polished off and threw out onto the highway three cigarettes all within roughly 10 minutes! …

I see this behavior every day … The worst was when a lit cigarette thrown from a window of the car in front of me actually hit my windshield and got stuck in the bay of my window wipers! …

Can you tell other drivers that if they see behavior like this they can contact the MN State Patrol and fill out an online form describing any unsafe or illegal driving (this includes littering)? Using the driver’s license plate number, they can fill out the form anonymously, and, depending on the act, a form letter will be sent to the registered owner of the vehicle alerting them of the incident, and that if they’re ever seen by a trooper performing the same action, they will be ticketed.

Roadguy shares Peeved’s peeve (click here for dark thoughts that Roadguy had about a different butt-tosser). The State Patrol page doesn’t specifically mention littering, but you can check it out here.

We wrap up today with this: As you may know, things have been a little crazy for Roadguy lately, what with two out-of-town trips, a last-minute radio gig, and the discovery that the Roadguy e-mail account has been screwed up for, oh, the last seven months. (If you’ve ever received an e-mail from me and tried to respond using the “reply” button, I probably didn’t get it. I apologize for not wondering earlier why so many people were ignoring me.)

But amid all of life’s chaos, there are signs, symbols, visual cues that the world hasn’t changed much, that some things remain constant in turbulent times. And so Roadguy was most comforted to return home from one of his trips and encounter this:

Yes, it’s a Rockettes-style wave of Moron parking jobs, with each vehicle just a little bit more to the right than the one next to it, ending with a perfect high kick: a pickup truck that’s half on the curb. (There were actually six drivers involved; a wider shot is here.) Ahhh — there’s no place like home.

Roadguy wishes everyone a Moron-free weekend. And, of course, if you have profound thoughts on any of the above (or on yesterday’s PhotoCop ruling), please share below.

Roadguy might be several hundred miles from home, but he’s still thinking about you, the Roadguy reader. And after this week’s numerous comments about slower drivers in the left lane, Roadguy was particularly excited to see this sign during his travels:

Yep, a lane-specific minimum speed. (This was on I-70 in Colorado, and considering I was in the back seat of a car going 65 m.p.h., the photo is something of a miracle.) Perhaps Minnesota should consider such signs – but first we’d actually have to agree on what the left lane is for.

Alert reader Pete, meanwhile, has been following this week’s latest round of bike-car discussions, and because he likes to stir up trouble, he offers us this thought from a member of Toronto’s city council:

“I can’t support bike lanes. Roads are built for buses, cars, and trucks. My heart bleeds when someone gets killed, but it’s their own fault at the end of the day.” — Rob Ford

The quote appeared here, in the Toronto Star. It seems unlikely that Mr. Ford will be the guest of honor at any “share the road” events.

Up next: A couple of pictures from loyal reader 406er, a man who, through no fault of his own, is a magnet for Moron parkers. The parking job in this first photo…

… isn’t tooooo horrible — there was at least some attempt to get the tires on the edge of the concrete, and perhaps there was a now-melted snowbank in the way when the car was parked. Still, one might wonder, “Just how hard is it to get close to the curb?” To answer that question, 406er offers this:

Yes, that’s a parked car, and it sat out there for quite some time – long enough for St. Paul officials to give it a ticket (and, one hopes, long enough for the driver to sober up and/or get an eye exam).

Finally, if you’re in the mood for more photos, check out the blog of loyal reader Aaron, who chronicled his Thursday afternoon commute on E. Lake Street, which has just begun yet another phase of its painful rebirth.

May your Friday and your weekend be as pain-free (and Moron-free) as possible — and, as always, leave Roadguy some comments below.

Roadguy is out on the road again for several days, but he knows that a day without a transportation blog is like a day without fossil fuels, so he’s endeavoring to provide you with at least a quick post or two to tide you over.

Fortunately, alert reader Amy sent along this extensive rant to keep y’all occupied:

What is it with men, trucks, and ridiculously loud exhaust systems? I will NEVER understand this. WHY would anyone want to ride in a vehicle with that much noise and vibration? And don’t tell me safety (so that others hear them), because many of them drive like maniacs.

Now, don’t get me wrong, it does not have to be a truck, I have seen it on cars also. But it often is a truck. Oh, and a redneck. Today a guy was in front of me who was the prototype: license plate was something like “toy4tom,” his exhaust was obnoxious, and he threw a cigarette butt out his window onto the road (ooooh, another great topic, is the world their ashtray?).

And I wonder about these so-called noise ordinance laws. Why are they not enforced? I guarantee you if some young kid was blasting rap music to that degree he would not go so easily unnoticed. But because it’s often a middle-aged, white baby-boomer, it’s completely tolerated.

I live about 3/4 of a mile from a relatively residential street… As I watch TV, I can HEAR some of these trucks for seemingly miles as they go by. And this is not an uncommon occurrence; quite the contrary, it’s almost constant. …

Some cyclists do this as well, and that is no less irritating. When my partner and I first visited downtown Stillwater, we mistakenly chose to eat outside at an Italian restaurant. Big mistake. Due to men (and some women) making rounds (yes, they repeatedly drive down the same street) on their ear-piercing cycles, we often could not converse.

It’s an honest question that I have for these people: what is the point of such an obnoxious vehicle? … Do we not get enough traffic-related noise living in the metro area? I am about 2 miles from 694 and can occasionally hear a semi-truck on the highway. But these loud exhaust vehicles take the cake. They are much more numerous and way louder. … Are these men trying to compensate for something that I need to know about? Because if I am supposed to feel sorry for them I would like to know….

Even my cats sometimes wake up startled. I live in Oakdale, but you would think it’s the “Dukes of Hazzard.” PLEASE MAKE IT STOP. Maybe I will contact the city right now and ask why noise ordinances are not enforced.

Roadguy isn’t sure about noise ordinances or how they’re enforced, but he’s pretty sure that Amy is not alone in her sentiments — and that more than a few vehicle owners are proud to be loud. Let’s, um, hear from both camps below.

We begin today with this beautiful, moody oil painting by loyal reader Becky:

OK, it’s not really an oil painting, but rather a photo that Becky took with her cell phone while heading to Red Lobster to celebrate her birthday. She writes:

What I captured was the large truck parking with its bum sticking over into the smaller car’s spot, even though the truck is parked next to a curb on the opposite side, thus having plenty of room to straighten out. Pretty lazy Moron, if you ask me. And the little car next to him probably had a lot of trouble getting out.

Roadguy agrees. And he’s also pleased that Becky sent along a photo that doesn’t involve someone hurting her car.

Next up: Two alert readers — Karen and Joel — e-mailed me a link to a blog page called Incomprehensible Intersections. It’s a quick pictorial overview of “spaghetti junctions” around the world. The photos look mighty real, and you might want to take a Dramamine before allowing your eyes to follow the path of a purported left turn in Moscow.

Our final item comes from Roadguy’s colleague Bill, proprietor of the weather blog Air Mass. Bill writes:

I came across this — quite SUDDENLY! — while steaming around a tree-lined corner on the bike path through Loring Park on Tuesday, the first day of spring:

At first I thought it might be a new Extreme Commute Course installed by the Minneapolis Park and Recreation Board, but officials tell me it’s just a temporary road for heavy equipment getting to and from the north bay of Loring Pond, where they’re dredging and removing some cattails. The bike path should be quarter-pipe-free by April 7.

Yikes, that’s quite a pile o’ wood chips — and a good reminder to seasonal bikers to check those brakes before heading out. You just never know what might cross your path.

Roadguy was on vacation last week (major gratitude to Greengirl for keeping the blogfires burning in my absence), and, because airplanes are full of germ-spewing humans, I wound up taking a sick day yesterday. But I’m officially back, and it’s time to share some transportation-related perspectives from my vacation destination: the Sunshine State. These veer a bit from my usual preoccupation with all things Minnesotan, but they’ll give us plenty to talk about. So, with pictures taken last week and a few from a trip last fall, here are 12 things Roadguy has learned in Florida:

1. If your driver’s side mirror starts to fall off but remains connected by a few ligaments, you can wrap it with duct tape and rags so it won’t bang up your door:

It looked a lot like a bunny slipper being tortured.

2. Coral Gables really aspires to be St. Louis Park:

With all due respect to our local shopping center of the same name, this “mile” is a little swankier (and longer than two blocks).

3. Florida has morons, too:

These folks decided to abort their left turn and were hovering between lanes in order to cut in front of us once the light turned.

4. Sometimes, if you find a parking meter but don’t have enough quarters, you can …

… pay by phone. It sounds easy at first, but you have to set up an account online, place a sign on your dashboard, call in and give your location for each payment, and also pay a 10% “convenience” surcharge and $5.95 a year. (The numerous steps are here.) The Twin Cities’ $5 parking cards suddenly seemed rather uncomplicated.

5. Florida drivers can use their license plates to show their love for bicyclists:

Aww, Roadguy loves intermodal harmony. Turns out that Florida has several dozen specialty license plates, featuring everything from sports teams to “family values” to “save the manatee.” Click here for a list.

6. There are many ways to try to track down killer drivers:

This grim sign was a definite eye-catcher, though the accident in question hadn’t taken place at the intersection where the sign was erected. Still, it was a sobering reminder of a vexing national problem.

7. Florida is a good place to rent a car …

… because you can pick it up at one location and drop it off at another without paying a drop-off fee. I don’t know whether this is a Florida law, but the major rental companies generally allow it, and it’s great if you want to fly down and do a one-way road trip within the state.

8. In-vehicle backup cameras are kind of cool:

They’re even cooler when Roadguy remembers to turn off the flash on his CrapCam, but you get the idea.

9. Navigation systems are also pretty cool:

Roadguy’s Florida friends have much fancier vehicles than he does. This system gives audio directions, and if you miss a turn, it tells you how to get back on track.

10. Florida is so car-oriented that one of its top playhouses is located in a strip mall:

Yes, you can take in some Noel Coward right next to the dinettes place and just down from the rug store. (The theater is actually pretty nice inside, and the company is moving to a new building in November.)

11. Florida has embraced electronic in-motion toll collection…

… and erected stern billboards:

Thank goodness that the SunPass transponder on my friend’s windshield worked like a charm – otherwise I would’ve felt compelled to turn him in.

12. Florida seems to be serious about carpool-lane violators.

I don’t have a photo for this one, but during a brief period one afternoon, I counted four solo drivers who had been pulled over on the left shoulder. The most amazing part: None of the other drivers slowed down to gawk, and rush-hour traffic kept moving at freeway speeds. If only we could train Minnesotans to do that.

So there you have it. Tomorrow, Roadguy will return to his regularly scheduled obsession with local transportation. In the meantime, if you’ve ever tried to pay for parking with your cell phone, or if you think Minnesota would be better off with 104 kinds of specialty license plates, or if you’ve ever used a bunny slipper to perform first aid on your car, I hope you’ll share your thoughts below.

Posted by guest blogger Greengirl

Like many Roadguy readers, my morning commute changes with the seasons. Weather permitting, I prefer to bike to the office (A pheasant, a deer, a family of pugs — You never know what you’ll find on the Cedar Lake Trail.). If I’m running late, I convince the BF to be my partner in crime in the HOV lane. Most mornings, however, I scramble out of the house — juggling coffee, keys and my super saver pass — to catch my bus, the 663 Express.

As any experienced bus rider can tell you, each Metro Transit route — heck, each Metro Transit bus — offers a unique slice of TC life (local storyteller and playwright Kevin Kling wrote a great play about Lake Street’s 21A). Ameriprise advisors, Target programmers, General Mills execs — the 663 is a cornicopia of corporate culture.

How do I know where my fellow commuters get their paychecks?

Because these businessmen and women use our 50 feet of communial space as their private office and conduct their business, often very personal business, ON THEIR CELLPHONES.

Don’t get me wrong, I do not mind a quick call to the bossman when somone’s running late. However — despite my iPod, despite my Nintendo DS — some bus riders with their booming voices and burgeoning dramas inevitably break through my defenses. And suddenly, my brain is overwhelmed by things I do not want to know, information I’d never want complete strangers to know about me.

Don’t tell us about your unfaithful wife. Don’t tell us about your kid in rehab. Please, please, please do not tell us about your mother’s cancer. It makes me feel bad for wanting to punch you in the hands-free device.